Star Trek: Voyager belongs to Paramount, no copyright infringement here,
just good ole' non profit fan fiction.
 

*****************************************************

Kathryn Janeway stood silently in her San Francisco residence, one of the
older houses in the bay area.  The rain continued to pound outside.

B'Elanna was in the living room, trying to get Kathryn's dog, Molly, to
settle down after getting over her initial excitement at being let indoors,
her tail wagging furiously.

The engineer seriously considered calling in some professional help, Janeway
seemed dangerously detached from reality, and slipping further away with
every breath.  As she was contemplating how to bring up the subject
Kathryn's voice startled her.

"I always thought getting home would be the solution for everything for me,
and I guess I began to rely on it too much, idealized it.  And now, here I
am, and it wasn't at all what I expected it to be."  There was no point
going into specifics.  She drew a breath and moved over to look out the
window.

"Do you have anything to drink, 'cause I need one."

"Kitchen, top right cupboard, there's some scotch."

"Would you like some?"

"No."

B'Elanna moved into the kitchen and began looking for a glass.

"You know, I'm trying really hard not to be pissed off right now.  With Tom,
I expected this kind of thing but what the hell was Seven thinking? I mean,
did she even give any thought about how this would effect you?"

"She thought she was doing the right thing.  She didn't know, besides, my
well being is not her responsibility.  She...never knew, I never told her."

"Why not? Why didn't you tell her before she chose to stay on Omega Prime?"

"I didn't want to interfere with whatever decision she chose to make."

B'Elanna pinched the bridge of her nose, as if it could ward off the
oncoming headache.  "Kathryn.."

"I know, in reflection it was not a good choice."
Her mind flashed backwards to the last time she had seen Seven, standing on
the rocky outcrop of the desolate planet, the wind whipping around her hair
which was uncharacteristically loose and not done up in her usual style.
She was already dressed in the black garb of the Nejad, the warrior class of
Omega Prime.  They said she was one of the best students they had ever seen,
and Janeway didn't doubt it for a moment.  There was a war coming and every
fighter was needed.

No words passed between them for a moment.

"You're hair's down."

"D'Lara said that I need to learn to be comfortable with my physical form.
Besides, she said if I didn't she'd sneak up on me when I was sleeping and
cut it off."

"I don't doubt it."

Her stomach turned a little at the thought of D'Lara, and it brought her
mind back to the present.  D'Lara had been the mysterious trainer of the
Nejad, who had taken on Seven as her apprentice.  She was strikingly
beautiful with dark hair, and ivory like complexion with unusually brilliant
green eyes.  She appeared human, and had a rather unusual story.  She
claimed to be an immortal born on Earth, who had left the green and blue
marble several decades ago and had vowed never to go back.  God only knew
what kind of biases she was feeding into Seven about her home world.

Janeway had always thought a good deal of Seven's decision to leave Voyager
involved D'Lara. Seven seemed to have a rather intense adolescent like crush
on D'Lara, one would have to know Seven rather well to see it manifest
itself in her behavior. Towards the end, Seven's insistence that she stay on
Omega Prime seemed to have more to do with D'Lara than the Nejad.

"Did you ever meet D'Lara, Seven's instructor?" Kathryn asked.

"Not really, I saw in the corridor that one time she came on board, but I
never spoke with her,"  B"Elanna replied from the kitchen.

"She came on board that day to convince me to order Seven to stay on
Voyager.  She said Seven's destiny lied with Voyager, not the Nejad."

"She didn't exactly turn her away though, did she?"

"No," she said, her mouth twisting down. "But that doesn't seem like her
style, either.

D"Lara had marched into her ready room, head held high, insisting that
Janeway order Seven to stay on Voyager, that her destiny lied with the
Federation ship and her crew.

"Seven is free to make her own choices, her own mistakes." She stated
pointedly from her seated position behind her desk.

D"lara had stalked up to the raised part of the ready room by the window and
spun around to look down on Janeway, leaning on the small railing.

"I don't want to see her make a mistake that can't be corrected, to lose her
chance to see her homeworld."  Her eyes seemed intense and it made Janeway
nervous. She was very conscious of D'Lara's physical posturing that put her
above Janeway so she could look down on her.

"I thought you were no fan of Earth."

"I can't stand that shit hole, but that's my problem."

"I thought you needed warriors."

"We do."  An unspoken current flowed between them, they both knew the
secrets Omega Prime held, and why it needed to be protected, and the
importance of the Nejad's position on the planet.

D'Lara leaned up and took a breath.  "There may be no turning back for her
if she chooses to stay."

"I'm aware of that, Master D'Lara."

"Well, when you've confronted your own feelings about Seven maybe we can
have a meaningful discussion on this topic, because I can see talking to you
about this is as productive as talking to a stone wall, and I can go home to
do that.  Good day, Captain."  She turned on her heel and stalked out of the
ready room.

Her stomach churned again at the memory.  D'Lara had been dead on, and it
had frightened her so much she had retreated into her own cave of denial.
 

B"Elanna sat down on the window seat with her drink.  "What was on Omega
Prime that was so important?"

"I was sworn to secrecy, B'Elanna."

"It's that important?"

"Yes, it is.  I think Seven had a crush on D'Lara, and I think it made part
of me angry, kept me from doing what I should have."
*************************************************
After Janeway had spoked to the council on Omega Prime she had declared the
planet off limits until further notice, she wanted to limit the interaction
of her crew with the planet's inhabitants as much as possible.

That night Seven had stormed into her quarters, demanding permission to beam
to the planet's surface.

"The restriction is only temporary until we get things sorted out-"

"D'Lara wanted to speak with me, and she does not utilize communication
devices."

"Seven, it's late," she got up from her chair and placed her book on the
footstool.  She stretched a litle to work the kinks out of her back.  "Why
don't you go regenerate and we'll discuss it in the morning."

Seven seemed to hesitate, then rose her chin.  "Then I will leave without
you permission."  She turned and walked out of the captain's quarters,
leaving her stunned and silent.
****************************************************

"I was jealous I think, and it clouded my judgement, kept me from..." She
made a helpless gesture.

"Telling her you loved her?"

"Exactly."  All she had managed to do that day was grab Seven up in a tight
embrace, tell her she would miss her, and try to leave it all behind, try to
forget the look in Seven's eyes, the way they had misted up as she watched
her captain beam out, never to see her again.

"B'Elanna, you better pour me a drink."

The engineer was happy to do so, glad to see Janeway finally release the
pent up frustration she had bottled up for the last year.

"I have made the worse mistake of my life B'Elanna, and there's no fixing
it, the damage has been done."
****************************************************

Light years away an ex-drone gazed into the star filled night, the same
thought dancing in her mind as she held back the tears that threatened to
overtake her.

In the darkness the immortal watched her, feeling the misery on the
wind...and made a plan.

End of part 2
 

Continued - Part 3

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