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Production #V905 - Episode 05
EXT. CAMP - BEFORE DAWN
It is a well-laid camp. A fire, banked to smoldering coals, glows mellowly in the darkness. Off to one side, a gold-colored mare twitches in her sleep, stamps one hoof, and swishes her tail before settling.
Closer to the fire, a large, rumpled bedroll is laid out, and beneath the fur cover two figures lay cocooned tightly against one another. The smaller of the two figures shifts, then shifts again, pulling slightly away from the comfortable grasp of her partner.
Another groan and she flips onto her side. Green eyes pop open and scowl.
Wha...? What is it?
One hand darts from beneath the warm blanket and searches around the ground under the bedroll until the offending rock is plucked up and tossed away.
Gabrielle squirms around, feeling for more rocks with the length of her body. Finding none, she smiles, satisfied.
Her smile broadening and her eyes closing, Gabrielle willingly snuggles back into Xenaís warm embrace.
All is silent for a moment.
Gabrielleís face twitches. She scrunches her nose, then brushes a hand against her cheek. Suddenly a sharp smack is heard, and Gabrielle once again opens her eyes, scowling.
You all right?
Tartarus blasted mosquitoes.
Why donít they ever
pick on you?!
ĎCause youíre a lot
sweeter than I am.
You know, Xena? Any
other night, that might
work. But tonight?
Itís almost dawn, and Iíve
had an hourís sleep, if that.
Xena opens one eye.
Weíll sleep in, then. Donít
have anywhere we
particularly need to be.
Easy for you to say. You
donít have mosquitoes
using you for target practice.
As Gabrielle rolls back to her, Xena tugs the fur blanket up so that it is covering all but the very top of Gabrielleís head.
Can you breathe all
right down there?
Gabrielle takes in a deep breath through her nose, smiling as she inhales the scent of leather and Xena.
Good. Try and get
some sleep. Iíll keep
EXT. CAMP - A LITTLE AFTER DAWN
Gabrielle awakens abruptly yet again. Keeping her eyes closed, she attempts to determine what has disturbed her slumber this time. No rocks. No mosquitoes. A searching hand makes its way to Xenaís side of the bedroll, only to find it empty. Not that this is surprising.
Finally, with a heartfelt sigh, she opens her eyes.
To find a rotten-toothed, ill dressed, unshaven, and stinking mass of humanity ogling her from above.
Grabbing her sais from the ground next to her, Gabrielle uses the butt of the left one to take the manís knee out, then quickly hops to her feet as he collapses onto the bedrolls.
The fallen man simply holds his knee and groans.
Gabrielle looks to her right to see Xena fighting four similarly disgusting bandits. Two more see her and head her way. She easily downs the first one with a right-left combination to the chest and a spinning kick to the head.
The second one, more cautious than his fellows, takes a little more time. After finally egging him into attacking with his sword, she catches the clumsy swipe with both of her sais, rips the weapon from his hands, drops the sais, and jabs two sets of fingers into his neck.
The man drops to his knees, breathless.
I was in a bad mood already, buddy,
and you just made it worse. So if
you donít want the last thirty seconds
of your life to be spent like this, Iíd
suggest you tell me what I want to know.
Having finished off with her own set of scumbags, Xena looks on, arms crossed over her chest, clearly impressed.
What in Tartarus are you doing here?
Saw two women sleeping alone in
the woods and what? Wanted
to invite us over for tea??
Leaning back, Gabrielle laughs. Itís not a very genuine laugh, but itís a laugh nonetheless.
Oh, buddy, did you ever pick the
wrong camp! Do you see any
jewels lying around here?
Any money, for that matter?
(seriously short of breath)
Gabrielle pretends to think about his plea.
I dunno. Xena....
Didnít realize that either, didja?
As I was saying, Xena, do you
think I should take the pinch off,
or should I keep the ďstupidĒ
genes from polluting the pool?
Gabrielle pretends to think a second longer, then with lightning speed, undoes the pinch. The man falls forward, gasping for breath. Gabrielle grabs his shoulder and pushes so they are again face to face. She leans in close.
You might wanna leave now.
Before I change my mind.
With wide eyes, the man jumps to his feet and runs out of the camp. The rest of his buddies are all the worse for wear and limp after him, holding tight to various wounds.
Still smirking, Xena crosses the clearing until she is by Gabrielleís side.
Well, that was a refreshing
pick-me-up, donít you think?
Laughing, Xena pulls Gabrielle in close and kisses the top of her head.
Sorry Ďbout that. I keep warning
them to just stick with me,
but they donít wanna listen.
Yeah, well, could
you do me a favor?
Thereís a coastal town not far
from here. Can we go there and
sleep in an honest-to-gods inn
tonight? Iím sick of rocks. Iím
sick of bugs. And Iím sick of
drooling, smelly bandits
interrupting my sleep. Please?
Gabrielle pulls away slowly, disbelief evident on her face.
Sure? That easy?
No arm twisting?
No cajoling? No pleading?
What Gabrielle wants,
END OF TEASER