Episode Guide Teaser Act 1 Act 2 Act 3 Act 4


ACT THREE

 

FADE IN:

 

INT. BEDCHAMBER - DAY

 

Gabrielle is standing before a long polished piece of metal that passes for a mirror. She is adjusting a leather top that is supposed to pass for a set of Amazon leathers.

 

GABRIELLE

I should have kept

my old ones.

 

She tries again to adjust her cleavage in the top and still isn’t satisfied.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)
How did I end up

doing this again?

 

Xena starts ticking points off on her fingers.

 

XENA

One, you’re an Amazon

Queen. Two, I had to

pose for the artist. Three....

 

GABRIELLE

I get it. It’s my turn.

 

XENA

Basically.

 

GABRIELLE

And the story is what?

 

XENA

I think the real story

works. We’ll just

substitute you for Rhea.

 

GABRIELLE

All right. I can live with that.

Now... what else do I

need to pull this off?

 

She stands staring at her reflection and a wicked grin plays across her face. Slowly she turns to Xena.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

A slave.

 

XENA

Oh, you think so, do ya?

 

 

GABRIELLE

Most definitely.  Not really a

slave per se, but more like a

general servant. You know,

my fetch and carry gal.

 

Xena grins and grabs for Gabrielle, catching her around the wrist and pulling her in to lift her up into her arms.

 

XENA

I’ll show you fetch and carry.

 

GABRIELLE

(laughing and squirming)

Xena!  Stop! Put me down!

 

XENA

Heh.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

INT. DINING ROOM – EVENING

 

Valius, Palaemon and Vidalus are all sitting, standing or pacing about the room each of them taking a turn at one action or the other, looking somewhat like a dance.

 

VAL

Where are they?

 

PALAEMON

Getting ready.  They said they

had to see if they could come

up with a proper Amazon outfit.

 

VAL

Why?

 

VIDALUS

If you want this to work Vallie,

trust them. They know what

they’re doing. They were doing

this before you were born.

 

PALAEMON

And Gabrielle really is an

Amazon Queen.  That

should impress Dameus.

 

VAL

You don’t think they’ll

give it away do you?

Even by accident?

 

VIDALUS

Not a chance. Once

they have a plan, it’s

as good as gold.

 

The door opens and they enter.  Gabrielle is in leathers that have been decorated and now are as close to authentic as they can get on such short notice. Xena on the other hand is dressed in a VERY skimpy leather skirt and halter.  If there was any less of the outfit, it would be napkins.

 

Val immediately takes notice. Palaemon isn’t completely disinterested. Vidalus is completely nonplussed. It takes a minute for any of them to form words.

 

PALAEMON

This will work.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

INT. DINING ROOM - EVENING

 

They are eating in relative silence... only the sound of clinking goblets and plates is heard. Xena takes a sip of her wine and gently clears her throat.

 

XENA

We’ve been thinking.

 

 

All eyes turn to her except for Gabrielle who continues to eat the food on her plate. It’s clear she’s heard this plan and is waiting to hear what they think.

 

XENA

(cont’d)

Gabrielle and I both feel that it’s

important that Vidalus is a part

of the meeting between the families.

 

Vidalus is all smiles. Palaemon even manages a grin as he leans forward to listen.  Val doesn’t look so sure.

 

XENA

(cont’d)

So what we’re going to do

is make him more... presentable.

 

Gabrielle looks up quickly and smiles at him.

 

GABRIELLE

Not that we don’t think you are now.

Xena and I think you’re wonderful,

but we’re concerned about Dameus.

If he suspects anything is out of

the ordinary, it could cause

him to call off the wedding.

 

VIDALUS

That would be the

least of our problems.

 

VAL

For you maybe.

 

VIDALUS

Now, Vallie I didn’t

mean it that way.

 

XENA

Face it Valius. Dameus has the

ability to flatten your father’s

kingdom in less than two days.

Now I know you love this girl, but

you must think of your family too.

 

Val nods, suddenly finding his wine interesting.  When Xena has chastised you, you stay chastised.

 

GABRIELLE

So, Xena will be working with

Vidalus to help him pass muster

while Dameus is here.

 

VAL

What happens

after the wedding?

 

XENA

You’ll be married. Once

Dameus gets his hands

on your father’s gold, I’m

sure nothing else will matter.

 

VAL

Good point.

 

VIDALUS

So, Xena what’s

our first lesson?

 

Xena looks up just in time to see him dabbing the corners of his mouth with his napkin.

 

XENA

Well for starters, stop that.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

EXT. GARDENS - MORNING

 

Xena is pacing back and forth.  She is in her regular leathers and armor, but without her weapons.  Her sword and chakram are lying on the same bench where Vidalus and Gabrielle sat the day before.

 

She is about to get really irritated when Vidalus joins her.  Her irritation quickly dissolves into something she can’t quite put her finger on, but it resembles trepidation. Vidalus is dressed in long flowing multicolored robes. All his fingers are adorned with rings, and around his neck are several necklaces of various precious stones and metals.

 

XENA

(to self)

Gods help me.

 

 

Vidalus stops and looks at the expression on Xena’s face.  He gives a quick glance around and then at himself.

 

VIDALUS

What?

 

XENA

I’m not even sure

where to start.

 

She looks him up and down for a moment then makes a decision.

 

XENA

(cont’d)

All right, first the jewelry has to

go. No man would be caught

dead wearing it. Hiding it in

a cave somewhere maybe,

but not wearing it.

 

VIDALUS

But Pala....

 

XENA

Do you want my help or not?

 

VIDALUS

Yes, I’m sorry.

Get rid of the jewelry.

 

XENA

And the robes. We need to get

you more suitable attire. A

merchant perhaps. Palaemon

does enough trade that it would

be believable that a member of

his family is the trade ambassador.

 

VIDALUS

This is the finest silk from Ch....

 

Xena holds up her finger and makes a noise that sounds something like ‘no’, but even the short word is clipped and direct.

 

 

VIDALUS

Fine.

 

XENA

I suppose next is your walk.

 

VIDALUS

What’s wrong with the way I

walk? I put one foot in front

of the other just like you do.

 

XENA

No you don’t.  I walk with long

strides. You scurry like a girl.

You need to learn to walk

like a man. Like this.

 

Xena takes a few steps forward. Her stride is long, steady and very masculine. Her arms move very little.  After taking a few paces back and forth she stops in front of him.

 

XENA

Can you do that?

 

VIDALUS

Well, it’s not difficult!

 

He takes a few steps, which start out fine, but quickly degenerate into a near run with his hands pulled up in front of his chest.

 

XENA

No. No, no, no.  You have

to… to… swagger.  That’s

it you need to swagger.

 

VIDALUS

I’ve never swaggered in my life.

 

XENA

No kidding. All right, let’s forget

the walk for now; we’ll deal with

that later. Can you hold a sword?

 

One of Vidalus’ hands goes to his hip, while the other gestures through the air.

 

VIDALUS

What do you think?

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

EXT. GARDEN - AFTERNOON

 

Gabrielle is moving through the garden, taking the time to stop and smell the flowers.  She happens upon Xena who is facing a tree with her forehead resting against it.

 

GABRIELLE

You haven’t been beating

your head against that

defenseless tree have you?

 

XENA

I considered it.

 

GABRIELLE

Is he hopeless?

 

 

XENA

Only if he wants to walk or

talk while they’re here.

 

Gabrielle can’t help herself and makes a sound that was suppose to be a laugh but comes out as more of a snort, directly from her sinuses.

 

Xena slowly looks up from the tree.

 

XENA

Well, that was attractive.

 

GABRIELLE

Do you have any

helpful suggestions?

 

XENA

I could kidnap Vidalus and

keep him hidden until it’s over.

 

GABRIELLE

It would break his heart.

 

XENA

I know.  We’re just going

to have to do our best

with what we’ve got.

 

GABRIELLE

We’ve managed

more with less.

 

XENA

Not by much.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

EXT. PALACE GROUNDS - DAY

 

Everyone is in place as they await the arrival of the royal caravan. Val is handsomely dressed in his best tunic. Palaemon is in royal regalia befitting his position. Vidalus is trying to look comfortable in a pair of soft doeskin trousers, knee boots and white shirt with a tan vest. There is a hat perched crookedly on his head that Xena finally had to concede to... much as she hated it.

 

Gabrielle stands in her Amazon gear, with a long cloak to ward off a slight breeze that is blowing. Xena is back in her napkins, only this time with a pair of thigh high black boots.  Her eyes roll slightly to the right as she feels Gabrielle looking at her.

 

XENA

I’ll get you for this.

 

Gabrielle merely bites her lips to hide her smile as she looks forward at the approaching caravan.

 

 

Two carriages, surrounded by a dozen well-armed guards pull through the gate and stop just a few feet away from the group.

 

Palaemon and Vidalus watch as Val’s eyes light up when a servant assists Alicia from the second carriage.  They are so wrapped up in watching him they almost make the first error in dealing with Dameus by not paying him the proper respect as he exits the first carriage.

 

Gabrielle makes the save by stepping forward.

 

GABRIELLE

Your Majesty, I am Queen Gabrielle

of the Amazons. On behalf of

King Palaemon and my son Prince

Valius of Magara we welcome you.

 

 

Dameus takes a moment to look Gabrielle over very appreciatively and take her hand to bestow a kiss to it.

 

DAMEUS

Delighted, Your Majesty. I am glad

you could make the long journey

from your tribe to be here.  I have

always been impressed with

Palaemon’s ties to your nation.

Your warriors are legendary.

 

GABRIELLE

Thank you.  Please

allow me to introduce you.

 

Turning she gestures to each one.

 

GABRIELLE

This is of course, Valius’ father,

King Palaemon.  Valius you know,

of course.  This is Valius’ Uncle

Vidalus.  He is the king’s most senior

and trusted trade ambassador.

 

Everyone holds their breath as the two men shake hands. When Dameus doesn’t appear to be taken aback in any way they all give silent thanks and let go of breaths they don’t realize they’re holding.

 

Dameus then notices Xena.

 

DAMEUS

Palaemon, you’ve provided

entertainment.  How kind of you.

 

GABRIELLE

Actually, Your Majesty,

this is....

 

She pauses and Xena knows she’s trying to come up with a good name for her servant.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Nikias.  She is my

personal servant.

 

DAMEUS

You’re not traveling

with guards?

 

GABRIELLE

Why would I need guards?

I’m here for my son’s wedding.

Besides... Nikias was a gift to

me from Artemis. If something

arises that I can’t take care

of myself, she certainly

will deal with it.

 

Dameus gives Xena another look and decides not to test Gabrielle’s word.

 

PALAEMON

Shall we adjourn inside?

We can find your quarters

and prepare for dinner tonight?

 

Xena and Gabrielle hang back and watch as the others head inside. Xena seems pleased that Vidalus is managing to not be his normal self.

 

XENA

I think we’re going to make it.

 

GABRIELLE

The evening isn’t over yet.

 

XENA

You had to point that

out, didn’t you?

 

 

GABRIELLE

Come, Nikias. Let’s not

keep our guests waiting.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

INT. DINING ROOM - EVENING

 

Everyone is seated at the table except for Xena, who is standing right behind Gabrielle’s chair. As servants place large trays on the table, Xena takes Gabrielle’s plate and begins placing various items on it after tasting each one first.  It’s a good show and Dameus is properly impressed.

 

 

DAMEUS

Would you be interested

in selling her?

 

XENA

No, she’s been pretty good

to me. I think I’ll keep her.

 

Gabrielle nearly spits her wine across the table as Palaemon and Vidalus have a hard time keeping their faces neutral.  Alicia smiles and looks to Gabrielle.

 

ALICIA

You’ll excuse me for saying so,

Your Majesty, but you seem much

too young to be Val’s mother.

 

GABRIELLE

More gifts from the Gods.

 

PALAEMON

Yes, I can honestly say Gabrielle

doesn’t look much older than she

did the very first time I saw her.

 

DAMEUS

So tell me Gabrielle, why have

the Amazons left the region?

 

GABRIELLE

I must do what is best for my tribes.

They have been relocated.  They are

by nature nomads who move from

place to place.  It was natural that

they would eventually leave.

 

Gabrielle leans nearer Dameus and smiles nicely, but with warning.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

I assure you that we are never

really far away and if Palaemon

were to call on me, I would be here.

 

DAMEUS

Oh, there will be no worries about

that. In an exchange of wedding

gifts, I’ll see to it that Palaemon

and the kingdom are well protected.

 

XENA

And he’ll see to it

your treasury is full.

 

DAMEUS

Seems an equal trade to me.

Gold buys power, you know.

 

Xena raises a brow and is about to say something when Gabrielle places a hand on her arm.

 

GABRIELLE

You know Dameus, Nikias is my

champion.  Perhaps tomorrow if

you would like, you two could spar.

 

XENA

(saccharine)

Oh could we, please? That would

just make my day. Why, I haven’t

had a good tussle in days.

 

 

DAMEUS

I would be delighted to see

what you can do. I’m sure

you’ve been well trained.

 

Before anyone notices, Gabrielle catches Xena’s hand to stop her from plunging the knife she’s gripping between Dameus’ eyes.

 

GABRIELLE

(through gritted teeth)

Put it down!

 

XENA

No!

 

GABRIELLE

Yes!

 

She shakes the knife loose as the other guests are beginning to take notice.  Vidalus leans over and whispers in Palaemon’s ear.

 

VIDALUS

And you were worried

about me?

 

FADE OUT.
 

END OF ACT THREE

ACT FOUR