*Many thanks to Kym Taborn - the following transcript is from a pre-release of "This Week in Xena News" (http://whoosh.org/xmr/twxn.html).

The Guardian (London) January 27, 1999

: Pass notes: No 1336: Xena Warrior Princess

Who she? A mighty princess, forged in the heat of battle.

She sounds a little like . . . American Secretary of State, Madeleine Albright? Er, no: Well, Albright seems to think they're alike. She has taken Xena, kung-fu Kiwi heroine of one of Channel 5's more popular programmes, as her role model. She recently told New Zealand's prime minister, Jenny Shiley, that she adopts 'Xena's power position' when faced with a troublesome crowd.

Is that the one with the triple backflip /sweepkick combination? Hope so; I'd love to see Binyamin Netanyahu's reaction.

Have they really got much in common? Well, let's consider the evidence . . .

Appearance: Albright is five foot two and was once described as a fat Eastern European peasant; Xena is six feet tall and wears lots of leather.

History: Albright fled Czechoslovakia after the Nazi invasion; Xena fled Amphipolis after an invasion of warlords.

Sidekicks: Xena unrolls her sleeping sack next to red-headed Gabrielle; Albright has balding 52-year-old Strobe Talbott, Deputy Secretary of State.

Fans: Xena has an immense lesbian following, perhaps due to her fantastic looks and ability to fight off half a dozen men at once . . .

Stop now! Okay, okay. I think the similarities end there, anyway. Certainly Albright would have difficulty among the Amazons, a tribe of young women who spear men and centaurs at any opportunity.

Ancient Greece must have sported more bare flesh than Baywatch. Xena wears real armour, but it's selective. As Gabrielle says when Xena acquires a Cleavage Dagger: 'It's not like your breasts aren't dangerous enough'.

What a gal. Albright could learn a lesson from her on diplomacy, too: 'If you like the sight of blood so much, keep talking,' says Xena.

Not to be confused with: The Citroen Xantia; any other member of the American cabinet.


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