Disclaimer: The characters of Xena and Gabrielle and others mentioned, belong to
MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No infringement on their rights is intended.
Subtext Disclaimer: Its back! Which means that there is a loving sexually explicit
relationship between two consenting adult females. If this bothers you, or youre
under age, or you live somewhere where this type of material is illegal, go away.
Timeline: Plan D #19. (Beware #20)
Shock Factor: 3.
Note:
Ann, what can I say, but thanks.
Dont drink and drive. Always wear your seat belt, or helmet.
Send comments to asdease1@gte.net
Enjoy.
Flying Peas
Setting her stuff down, Xena began humming her portal tune, then opened the door and
stepped into their bedroom in the Palace. "Gabrielle, hold this open, will ya?"
"Got it." Her arms full of books and things, the bard held the door open with
her foot. "Xena, can you take some of this stuff?"
"Sure." Taking an armful, the warrior began shuttling back and forth between the
two domiciles, carrying everything they thought theyd need for the conference to the
other side. After ten trips, she made a last pass around the house, to check for anything
theyd left behind. Since she didnt want to have to stress T with going back
and forth every night, she and the bard had packed like they were going on a world cruise
and had left their house relatively bare, except for the fish and the wall of plants
Taking a good look at the aquarium, she sighed. "Sorry guys, I cant take ya
with us, but Ive got the auto feeder set up and one of us will be back in a couple
of days to check on ya." Seeing tiny irritated bubbles, she shrugged, then turned to
head back to the portal.
"Did we miss anything?" Still playing doorman, Gabrielle was checking out the
kitchen.
"I think weve got it." Cracking her neck, Xena put her hands on her hips.
"Weve got the phones set up and the answering machine and the auto feeder will
save the fish from Dad, so I think thats it." Smiling, she rolled her eyes.
"Now all we have to do is face the Ungara and pray we dont fall on our
faces."
"What do you think I was doing in the bathroom all morning?" Chuckling, the bard
grasped a leather clad sleeve and tugged the warrior toward the door. "Come on.
Lets get this over with."
Xena squeezed her eyes shut for a second, then took a deep breath and nodded. Letting the
breath out slowly, she walked through the portal.
Letting the door close behind them, Gabrielle took a look around the room. "I think
we need to have Ares give us some more closet space." Scratching her cheek, she
stepped over several boxes, trying to get to the bed and their suitcases. "Well
never get all this in what weve got now."
"Hmmmm." Nodding, she arched an eyebrow. "I think youre right.
Ill go get him." Doing a 180, she opened the door and peeked out. Seeing the
hallway of the Palace, she took another deep breath. "Okay, were here and
were coming out, so there had better not be any buck naked bodies running around,
cause Ive got my pea shooter and somebody would be in
trrrrrroooouuuubbbblllleeee."
"Xena!" Rolling her eyes, she jumped and hopped her way to the door. "Would
you be nice?" Slapping the warriors shoulder.
Laughing, Xena smiled. "Im sorry, but knocking on the inside of a door seems
just plain stupid." Getting a glare, she glared back. "Ready or not!"
Pulling the door open wide, she stepped out into the hall and stopped cold, when her eyes
saw one smirking God of War, one embarrassed King, one immortal tiger with his paws over
his eyes and one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight Ungaran clan elders giving her
an amused, perplexed stare. "Oops." Wincing, she grabbed Gabrielle by the arm
and yanked her into the hall, placing the blonde in front of her like a human shield
against the blush welling up from her toes. Giving them a full tooth grin, she whimpered.
"Xena, what are you doing?" Yanking her arm back, she glared at the grinning
idiot for a second, then turned to see the same thing that had made her partner
speechless. "Hi." Giving the elders a little wave, she jabbed her elbow into the
ribs behind her. "If youll just excuse us." Nodding and bowing, Gabrielle
shoved the speechless warrior back into their room and closed the door. "I cant
believe you just did that." Whispering harshly, she covered her eyes.
"I didnt know they were out there." Whispering back, Xena covered her face
with her hands.
"I guess knocking on the inside of a door doesnt sound so stupid anymore."
Folding her arms across her chest, the bard rolled her eyes. "Gods! What a first
impression to make."
Groaning, the warrior made her way to a clear spot on the floor and plopped down.
"These are the heirs to your throne?" One chuckling elder asked.
Closing her eyes, T hung her head. "Yes."
"Interesting choice." Another one smirked. "So that was the infamous Xena
and Gabrielle?"
"In the flesh." Ares laughed.
Sighing, the King gave him a quick glare, before she smiled at the elders.
"Gentlemen, if you dont mind . . . " Lifting her eyebrows as a nudge.
"Say no more." Waving his hands around, Cargan smiled. "Well get out
of your hair."
"Thank you." Extending her hand, T shook their hands as they left and held on to
Cargans. "If word of this gets around, Im holding you responsible."
"Oh, sure. Hang the Captain of the Royal Guard, its always his fault."
Throwing his hands in the air, he made a dramatic walk to the door. "Just use and
abuse us. Now I know what my poor, poor ancestors went through." Taking hold of the
knob, he smiled then bowed. "Ive got to read Lemets journals again. I
dont remember this being part of the job requirements."
"Out!" Shouting, with a chuckle, the King watched her Captain depart. Shaking
her head, she sighed. "Ares, would you go and tell them the coast is clear?"
"The coast is clear!" He yelled from his seat, then got a pillow up side his
head.
Waiting for the girls to come out, T watched the hallway for a couple of minutes, then
rolled her eyes and got up. "Great." Shaking her head all the way to the door,
she knocked, then opened the door. "Okay, you can . . . where the hell did all this
stuff come from?" Glancing around the floor, she spotted the warrior behind one box
and the bard sitting on another. "Is this a permanent move?"
"Are they gone?" Xena asked from behind her box.
"Yes." Stepping inside, T closed the door, then put her hands on her hips.
"Now is somebody going to explain all this?"
"We didnt want you to have to keep opening the portal so we could go back and
forth, so we brought everything wed need." Waving a limp hand, Gabrielle used
it as a resting post when she leaned over to put her elbow on her knee.
"The conference is a month long." Scratching her head, the god shook it.
"Did you bring everything but the fish?"
"Just about." Getting to her feet, the warrior nodded. Stepping over boxes and
things, she trudged her way to where her friend was standing. "Im so
embarrassed."
"Oh, dont worry about it." Waving the incident off, T smiled. "Cargan
will handle the rumor mill and nobody but those eight will ever know." Pushing Xena
out of her view, she checked out the room again. "Youre never going to get all
this in your closets, you know that dont you?" Glancing at the bard.
"We were on our way out to ask Ares to give us some more space." Perking up a
bit, Gabrielle stood and stretched. "That was before she shoved her foot in her
mouth."
"Yada, yada, yada." Putting her hands on her hips again, T began trying to
organize the room in her mind. "We might have to extend this room into the one next
door." Thinking out loud, she started to step over a box, but was held up when a hand
grabbed her arm. "What?" Turning toward curious blue eyes.
"What do you thing youre doing?" Gently pulling the god back, Xena took
her turn to put her hands on her hips. "And what are you doing walking around?
Youre supposed to be resting."
"Yea." Nodding, Gabrielle threaded her way though the boxes to do her hands on
hips thing. "And I thought Xena told you you couldnt have any visitors? So what
were those men doing up here?"
"Whoa." Holding up her hands, T shook her head. "Dont go ballistic,
okay. They were up here to say hello and thats all, we didnt discuss any
business and they just wanted to congratulate me in person for the baby and Im in
here," pointing at her feet, "because I waited for five minutes for you to come
out and you didnt and the reason Im walking around," swirling one finger
in a circle, "is because you wont let me pop anywhere and up until you two
showed up, I was resting." Putting both hands back on her hips as a finale.
"Well, were here now and youre going straight back to either the bed, or
the couch, but you are going to get off your feet right now." Taking hold of her arm,
Xena opened the door and towed T into the hallway. "Couch, or bed?"
"Couch." Sighing, she let herself be dragged back into the living room and sat
down like an obedient patient.
"Now, stay there." Waggling her finger at the god, the warrior turned to Ares.
"And what happened to making sure she was resting?"
"Look. I carry her from the bed to the couch and back and I dont let her
outside, so unless youre going to let me sit on her, I cant keep her from
getting up every once in a while." Glaring at her accusations, he folded his arms
across his chest. "But I do keep her from running around naked though." Smiling
smugly.
"Okay." Interrupting the eruption before it happened, Gabrielle stepped in.
"We get the picture. Shes been good, but everybody needs to stretch their legs
now and again."
"Thank you." Rolling his eyes, Ares got up. "If nobody needs me, Ill
be checking in with the elders. Ive got to get them to their right rooms."
"Thanks, honey." Smiling at his snit, she gave him a wink.
Sticking his tongue out at the warrior, Ares gave T a smile then left.
"I thought the pregnant one was supposed to go through mood swings." Chuckling,
Gabrielle sat down beside T.
"Thats not a mood swing." Grumbling, Xena sat down on the other side of
the King. "Thats his natural state of annoying."
"Oh, I can see this is going to be a stressless month." Sighing, T laid her head
on the back of the couch and stared up at the ceiling.
Smiling, the bard leaned over to talk to Ts oversized tummy. "Dont worry.
I wont let your Dad and Aunt Xena tear your empire apart before you get here."
Chuckling, Xena cocked her head to give her wife a curious stare. "Gabrielle, what
are you doing?"
"To be forewarned is to be forearmed." Smiling sweetly, she gave the tummy a
gentle pat. "Thats not rule number one, but its still important. Rule
number one is never, ever interrupt a perfectly good nap, or as we so affectionately
rephrase it. Let T sleep, or shell rip your head off."
"Get away from there." Pushing the blonde head away from her stomach, T laughed,
which made her middle jiggle.
Falling slowly over, Gabrielle laid there and smiled.
"Hey." Reaching over Ts lap, Xena smacked the bards exposed fanny.
"Go get my bag, so I can take a listen. I wanna see how the competition is
doing."
Throwing her arms out in mock woe, the blonde actress rolled off the couch and sprang up
to her feet. "Where is it?"
"In the box marked basics." Leaning upright, the warrior gave the general
dimensions of the box with her hands. "I think I put it beside the bed."
"Gotchaaaaaa." Bouncing off to find the box, she ignored the sounds of amusement
and continued on her happy way.
"Is she happy to be here, or what?" Rolling her eyes, T shook her head and
folded her hands on her stomach.
"I think shes happy, because she knows that once this conference is over,
well be able to actually get some sleep." Propping her feet on top of the low
table, she leaned back.
"I offered to implant everything in your head, so dont blame me if you
didnt get your recommended daily allowance of shut eye." Waving her finger, the
god smiled.
"It wasnt worth the risk and besides, the studying did pay off in more ways
than one." Flicking her eyebrows, Xena turned to smile smugly at her friend.
"Oh, shut your face." Sighing T propped her feet beside the warriors.
"The last thing I want to hear about is your sex life." Snapping her fingers,
she turned to give Xena a warning glare. "Which reminds me, warrior princess."
Waggling her finger. "Since Im confined to these quarters, I dont even
want to hear so much as a hiccup coming from your room. I cant leave when you two
start going at it, therefore you can either abstain, or shove a sock in your mouth,
because if I hear anything, youre going to have the ultimate flashback and sleep
outside."
Xena bit her lip and smiled. "Are we a tad frustrated, T?"
"No, we have sensitive ears and as my very concerned doctor, Im sure
youll find a way to keep quiet, because Id hate to have to get stressed when I
come down to throw your raggedy butt outside, which will probably be buck naked."
Opening her eyes wide, she glared. "Got me, screaming mimi?"
Giving her a thumbs up, she refrained from chuckling and started trying to figure out how
to sound proof the walls of their room.
"Xena, get in here!" Sticking her head out the door, Gabrielle yelled for the
warrior. "Youve got three boxes marked basics and theyre all full of
junk." Ducking back inside, she shook her head at the mess.
"Geez. Im coming." Grumbling, Xena got up and stepped over Ts legs
to trudge toward the hall. "Its right on top, Gabrielle. How can you miss
it?" Entering the room, she threw her hands in the air. "What did you do? Why is
my stuff all over the bed?"
"I turned those damned boxes upside down looking for your bag, dummy. Thats
what happened." Putting her hands on her hips, she kicked one of the empty boxes.
"Now, that kind of yelling I can take." Smiling, T folded her hands behind her
head and closed her eyes.
Bud crawled up on the couch and put his head on Ts lap.
Without looking, the god lowered one hand to scratch is neck. "I know, Bud. Its
just like the old days."
Purring, he happily agreed.
**********
"Well?" Staring down at her bare tummy, T watched the end of the stethoscope
move around.
"Shhhh." Listening carefully, Xena found the heartbeat and smiled. Moving the
disc again, she searched for any signs of abnormality, then frowned when her ears detected
a low rumble.
"Beef stew." The patient said with a smile. "It had carrots in it and they
always make that noise."
Arching an eyebrow, the warrior sighed. Mumbling something about an all meat diet, she
continued to listen carefully, then nodded and smiled. "Sounds like a healthy baby to
me." Pulling the plugs out of her ears, she let the instrument hang around her neck.
"Now, lets see if its got any of its mothers spunk."
Flicking her eyebrows, Xena put her hands on Ts midsection and began pushing gently,
then moved to push again.
"Gabrielle, whats the count?" Sighing, the god cracked her neck.
"According to our calculations, 117 days." Smiling, the bard watched Xenas
hands move around.
"Im surprised youre not counting off the seconds." Smirking, Xena
felt a healthy kick. "I wasnt talking to you." Glaring down at a tanned ab
section, she pulled Ts shirt down. "That one has got an attitude already."
Chuckling, she removed the stethoscope and put it back in her bag.
"Well, Ill call that a compliment, since it came from an expert." Smiling,
T pulled the covers up over her little attitude.
Smiling ever so sweetly, the warrior intentionally looked at her watch. "Oh, my.
Its swill time." Giving a poor rendition of being surprised.
Growling low, the god closed her eyes. "I hate you."
Picking up her bag, Xena nodded at Gabrielle. "Come on, Igor. Lets go down to
the laboratory and see what we can create for the all mighty King to drink."
Chuckling, the bard gave T a sympathetic pat on the arm and leaned close to whisper in her
ear. "Dont worry. Ill put the peach juice in when shes not
looking."
"Thank you." Whispering back, she opened her eyes to smile insincerely at Dr.
Frankenstein. "Cant wait." Watching them go, she sighed and closed her
eyes again, then opened them when she felt the bed shake.
"Sooooooo. Hows my little sweet pea doing?" Aphrodite asked, as she
scooted up next to T.
Smiling, the god gave the Goddess of Love a roll of the eyes. "The babys fine.
Xena just did a quick check-up."
"Good." Crossing her legs, she got comfortable. "Now, Ive got some
good news and some bad news."
Frowning, T gave her an arched eyebrow. "I didnt realize I was expecting
news."
"Oh, you arent, but since youre 86ed with the buzz, I thought Id
fill you in." Aphrodite tapped her chin. "Okay, first the not so hot news, since
youre in non-stress mode, Ill save the best for last."
Chuckling, the King folded her hands over her stomach and smiled.
"Those boring poop heads, aka TPTB are all in a dither about something going on over
there." Pointing to one side of the room.
Turning her head, T realized she was facing east and nodded. "Thats
typical."
"And then theres the hoopla over the nuky thingies." Counting off her news
on her fingers.
"The disarmament." Smiling, she was starting to enjoy the hip version of the
world situation.
"Right and let me see, they said something about the baby." Wrinkling her
perfect brow, the goddess frowned. "Oh, yea." Bobbing her head, as the thought
popped in. "They are wondering if youre going to retire."
"Is that part of the good news, or the bad news?" Lifting her eyebrows with the
question.
"Eeennn." Rotating her wrist to give a half and half sign. "I think
theyre looking for a break. Theyre pretty pumped, since youre all
preggers and everything."
"Are they up to something?" Feeling her stress level go up a notch.
"Oh, no." Waving her hand to dismiss the thought. "Theyre all running
around in flowered shirts and plaid shorts." Shivering at the vision, Aphrodite
cringed. "Its like a luau from tartarus up there and let me tell you, those
people have absolutely no fashion sense." Shaking her head in sorrow. "There
were a couple of them that said something about the baby being a bad idea, but
theyre wearing black socks with sandals, so nobodys paying any attention to
them." Shrugging with a sigh. "So much power wasted on fashion victims. What a
pity."
Holding her stomach, T closed her eyes to hold in the laughter. "Anything else?"
Shaking her head with the visual going on, she opened her eyes to get rid of it.
"Yea, the good news." Smiling, she patted a blanket covered thigh. "You
dont have to worry about the whole old people poking their heads in and bothering
you thing."
"Pardon?" Sending her eyebrows skyward.
"Oh, yea." Doing another round of head bobbing. "Ive worked it all
out with Ares. Weve got everything set up, so you dont have to worry and
little sweet pea with be nice and comfy. Weve got all the geezers sorted and
rearranged the chats and dumped some of those pesky groupies, so you just relax and let
Auntie Aphrodite take care of everything." Smiling proudly, she popped out.
Suddenly, Ts stress level started following her eyebrows. "ARES!" Roaring
out his name, she was out of bed and halfway down the stairs before he popped in and was
in the process of strangling her significant other, when Xena and Gabrielle came to his
rescue. "What have you done?" Growling at him.
"What?" Holding the wrists that were attached to the hands around his neck, he
looked completely innocent and very surprised.
"T, what are you doing? Let him go!" Pulling on her powerful arms, Xena pried
one off.
Groaning, Gabrielle got the other one off at the same time and they both held the King in
check, while the God of War took a few discreet steps backwards. "Whats the
matter with you?"
"Are you out of your mind?" T shouted. "You let Aphrodite rearrange my
conference?"
Wincing, Ares rubbed his forehead. "She just helped me get everything settled."
"What?" Keeping a firm grasp on her friend, Xena turned to glare at him.
"Are you nuts?"
"I had a lot to do!" Pressing his head in a hand vise, he smiled. "We
didnt do much."
"Then what the hell does getting rid of some pesky groupies mean?" Settling down
a bit, T only snarled this time.
"Groupies?" Gabrielle asked and let Ts arm go, so her friend could fold it
with its match, across her chest.
"There were a lot of people showing up, other than the elders, who wanted to see you,
because youre pregnant." Sighing, Ares shook his aching head. "We sent
them home, so you wouldnt be bothered."
"Gods." Rolling her eyes, Xena stepped back to lean against the railing.
"How many?"
"Thousands." He said softly. "It was starting to look like the old days
around here. There were people everywhere and they kept coming. I didnt have
anything set up for that many people and they were hungry and wanted someplace to sleep
and nobody wanted to have to stay in the back and they all kept nagging me to come see
you, to say congratulations, and they brought gifts and the library is crammed up to the
ceiling with stuff." Sighing, he shook his head. "Im sorry."
T sighed as well and closed her eyes. "I thought I told you to send out a message
that they would be able to come, once the baby was born and not until?"
"I did." Taking a few cautious steps forward, he looked up at her.
"Apparently everybody thought everybody else was going to stay home and they
didnt think the a couple of people would be that much of a problem."
Sitting down on the stairs, the god hung her head and began rubbing her temples.
"Okay, lets not panic. This is fixable." Rubbing her forehead, Gabrielle
descended the stairs. "Has any other groupies showed up since you sent the first
batch home?" Aiming her question at Ares, she saw him nod. "Where are
they?"
"Mingling around out front." Tossing a thumb over his slumped shoulder.
"Okay." Turning around, she walked back to the staircase. "Xena, you take
care of T and Ill handle the groupies."
"I dont need to be handled." T said with a hint of animosity. "What I
need is to get out of this room and get some fresh air."
"T." Shaking her head, Xena bent down to speak to her friend. "Thats
not a good idea and you know it."
Opening her eyes, the King of the Ungara rose to her feet and glared golden cat eyes at
the warrior princess. "Let me tell you what I know, Xena. Ive been cooped up
here forever and Im on the verge of having a serious problem with you in my face and
if you think youve got what it takes to keep me from going outside, Ill be
more than happy to prove you wrong. Thats what I know." Growling low, she
turned and walked down the stairs. "Move!" Pushing Ares aside, she made it to
the front door before a short blonde body got in her way. "Gabrielle." Feeling
her fangs come out, she narrowed her eyes to glare at her best friend.
"Im not stopping you." Holding up her hands, the bard put her back against
the door. "Im asking you to let me go with you. Ive got to go out there
anyway and Id be happy to take any advice you can give on how we should get rid of
the groupies." Smiling, she took Ts hand slowly. "Wadda ya say? Wanna give
me a hand?" Giving the gods clawed appendage a gentle squeeze.
"Fine." Raising a single eyebrow, she let the bard open the door then followed
her out onto the balcony. "Go get all the groupies together, while I check out the
Library." Turning, she didnt wait for an answer and walked away from the bard,
heading for the second floor door of the gift storage facility.
Letting out a sigh of relief, Gabrielle poked her head back inside the chambers and shook
her head. "Ares, find Aphrodite and get this place back to normal before we get back,
please."
"Ill go with him." Xena offered and came down the steps to smack him
upside the head. "Come on, you." Grabbing his ear, she towed the God of War
toward the door.
"Ow, ow, ow." Waking on his tip toes, Ares craned his neck to relieve the pain.
Running down the stairs, the bard found Cargan and told him what was going on. She also
informed him that T was on the move and that everybody should stay out of her way, unless
their life insurance policy was paid up. Then she went onto the promenade and began
rounding up the groupies, but to her dismay, they didnt want to be wrangled and were
not being the slightest bit cooperative, considering her status as heir to the throne, or
so she thought. "Dammit, people. You want to work with me here, please?"
Clapping her hands, she tried to get the several thousand peoples attention.
"Whats the problem?" Xena asked, as she walked over.
"Look at them." Waving her hands around. "Theyre acting like Im
not even here. Theyre just doing what they want, taking pictures, getting acquainted
and driving me nuts." The last word was said with the volume turned all the way up.
"Ill take care of it." Taking a deep breath, the warrior let out a loud
battle cry and smiled when it got everybodys attention. "Okay, listen up."
Opening her mouth to give instructions, she closed it when they immediately went back to
what they were doing. "Why those little. . ." Bounding down the steps, with the
bard right behind her, she was intent on doing bodily harm when her eardrums reverberated
with a loud roar. Turning around, she saw T standing at the top of the stairs with her
hands on her hips. "Oh, shit. Hang on Junior, Moms on a roll."
Growling, T surveyed the crowd. Seeing some very surprised faces, she arched an eyebrow
and pointed down to her friends. "These women are the heirs to my throne, which means
that I have entrusted them with my own personal well being, as well as the well being of
my child and my empire, of which you are a part. They have taken it upon themselves to put
their personal happiness aside to take care of me and have sacrificed greatly in the
preparation of this conference, to which you have not been invited. You will give them the
respect they deserve and have earned. I appreciate your concern and your desire to pass
along your congratulations, but this is neither the time, nor the place for those
sentiments. This is a conference to decide our futures and to make decisions that will
effect the entire planet, which these women will be my personal representatives for."
Putting her hand back on her hip, she paused to give them a glare. "I suggest that
you choose to treat my heirs, as you would me, because if I have to come out here again,
you wont be happy when I do. Is that clear?" Seeing several thousand heads nod,
she smiled. "Good. Im going to take a nap now and I dont want to hear of
anymore disrespect." Giving the girls a nod, T turned on her heels and went to take a
nap.
"You know." Xena said softly. "If thats an example of her mood
swings, as much as I hate to admit it, I think I feel sorry for Ares." Smiling, she
turned to see the same emotion on Gabrielles face.
Chuckling, Gabrielle nodded. "I know and I hope junior doesnt have all the
attitude you think, becasue Ill bet if its true; somebodys little bottom
is going to be very sore if they try to use it on her." Smiling, she turned to see a
lot of people eagerly awaiting instructions, with very respectful expressions on their
faces. "My, speaking of sore bottoms. I guess the King has spoken."
"Okay, people. Lets get this showboat on the river." Smiling, the warrior
put her hands on her hips and started barking out instructions to the crowd.
Inside the chambers, T plopped down on the couch and put her feet on the table, with a
smile on her face and patted the empty spot beside her. "Come on, Bud."
Jumping up, Bud leapt over the table to land on the spot indicated and laid down. Putting
his head in her lap, he gave T a disapproving look.
"Oh, dont look at me that way." Rolling her eyes, she scratched his
striped head. "So I yelled a little bit. I think it did me some good."
Bud sneezed in a negative way.
"Come on. It was one little roar and it felt good." Patting her stomach, she
smiled. "See, the babys fine."
Taking a sniff, he shook his head.
"All right. All right. I wont do it again." Sighing, T laid her head.
"Its not like I was doing sword drills or anything."
Lifting his head higher, Bud nudged her arm with his nose.
"What?" Rolling her head to the side, she looked at him.
Sneezing again, he gave her a serious stare.
"No, I have not been doing sword drills, Bud." Rolling her eyes.
"Youve been here the whole time. Have I been out my chambers?"
Tilting his head in thought, Bud laid back down.
"Thank you." Giving his huge head a shove, she closed her eyes. "Id
like to do some sword drills, but I wont because Im stuck in here until your
little brother, or sister shows up."
Purring, the tiger closed his eyes.
"I cant go for a run, I cant hunt, I cant swim, I cant . . .
. . . . . . . . . ."
Nuzzling his head into her lap, Bud followed T into slumber.
**********
"Oh, come on, guys." Aphrodite whined and stomped her foot. "I was just
trying to help."
"Oh, you helped alright." Folding her arms across her chest, Gabrielle glared at
the Goddess of Love. "You helped Ts blood pressure go through the roof."
"I didnt mean it." Pouting, the goddess slumped her shoulders.
"Cant I stay? I wont give you guys anymore trouble, I promise."
"Why do I find that hard to believe?" Ares asked and got two glares pointed at
him. "What?"
"Youre the one who let her help you and got T all worked up, so dont act
so innocent." Xena growled.
"You want to help, Aphrodite?" Keeping her eyes on the only other blonde in the
room.
"Yes." Smiling, she nodded heartily.
"Good, then you can use your powers to get all those groupies back home."
Turning to Ares, she smiled. "And you can take all those gifts in the Library and
start taking an inventory. Well be spending weeks mailing out thank you notes and I
dont want to miss anybody."
"Hey, you better let me do that." The goddess suggested. "I think
theres some stuff in there that hes not going to know what they are."
The heirs exchanged a look then nodded. "Okay, Aphrodite does the inventory and Ares
takes everybody home." Xena said and scratched her cheek. "That should keep both
of you occupied for awhile, so Gabrielle and I can check on T and then we can get ready
for the start of the conference tomorrow."
"What do you want me to do when Im done?" Ares asked, thankful he
wasnt going to have to sift through the mountain of gifts.
"Have you got everything else set up?" Seeing a nod, the warrior nodded back.
"Then you can come back to the chambers. Ts probably a sleep on the couch and
youll need to carry her up to the bedroom."
"Okay." Smiling he left the throne room to take care of the groupies.
"And what about me?" Looking pitiful, the Goddess of Love hoped she wasnt
going to be exiled from her sweet pea.
Sighing, Gabrielle shook her head. "You can stay, but youve got to promise not
to do, or say anything else that might upset T."
"How am I supposed to know the difference?" Looking between the two sets of eyes
on her.
"You can hold normal conversations, but if you have anymore news, clear it with us
first." Xena sighed. "Or else, your niece or nephew may not like the shake
rattle and roll itll get when its mother blows her stack again."
"Gotcha." Giving them a wink and a thumbs up, she hopped off the arm of the
throne and did her walk toward the Library.
"Did we get everything?" Straining her strained brain, the bard sat down on the
throne.
"I think so." Nodding, the warrior leaned up against the carved stone arm.
"And to think I was worried about having to face the Ungaran elders. With the scream
team on the loose, thatll be the least of our problems."
Smiling, Gabrielle moved to slide back on the throne and got her butt poked.
"Yeow." Jumping up, she turned to see the Crown shoved up against the back of
the throne. Rubbing her bottom, she picked up the golden crown and held it up to eye
level. Chuckling, she put it back down and stepped back to take a look at it against the
deep blue and green of the of the throne.
"What are you doing?" Giving her wife a funny look, Xena moved her eyes back and
forth. "Is there something wrong?"
"No." Smiling, she tilted her head and stared. "Im just trying to
imagine what T looks like with that on." Nodding at the crown. "Ive never
seen her wear it."
"Hmmm." Stepping back, the warrior stood beside the bard. "I think
youre right. Ive never seen her wear it either." Frowning, Xena shook her
head, then snapped her fingers. "Oh, wait. I remember." Closing her eyes, she
smiled. "She said that she wouldnt wear it until shed fulfilled her
destiny and rid the world of evil and made the earth safe for mankind." Opening her
eyes, Xena stepped forward to pick up the crown. "According to T, until shes
done all that, this is still her fathers crown. Thats why she doesnt
wear it."
"But she has done all that and more." Shaking her head, Gabrielle took the crown
from the warrior.
"Then maybe she just hasnt had a reason." Shrugging, Xena sighed.
"The crown, the sword, the things her father left her. He gave her everything he
had."
"Except himself." Nodding, she put the crown back on the throne. "Well,
this baby wont be an orphan and it wont be hunted. Shes earned that
crown and someday this baby will wear it too, because were going to be there to make
sure it happens."
"Will we still be heirs when that happens? Or will be become peons when T
retires?" Posing the question to the bard, her head snapped up when she heard a
chuckle coming from above.
"Xena, you and Gabrielle will never be peons as long as I have anything to say
about it." Leaning on the balcony railing, T smiled down at them. "And I have
worn that crown once, but that was because Treyma threw a fit when I refused to put it on
for the official portrait."
"Youre not wearing the crown in that picture. Its sitting on top of a
pillar." Holding her hand at chest height, she indicated the position of the crown.
"I never said I kept it on." Smirking, she waved them up. "Come on. Tell me
how you saved my empire from utter ruin."
"Only if you promise not to lose your temper again." Waving a warning finger up
in the air, Xena smiled.
"Is it that bad?" Waving a finger back.
"Noooo." Rolling her eyes, Gabrielle grabbed Xenas finger and tugged her
toward the stairs. "In fact, it might turn out to be a good conference after
all."
"Okay, then I promise not to loose my temper while you tell me." Smirking, she
got a glare from the warrior. "Hey, its a start and dont push your luck,
little miss Ive got a pea shooter."
Grumbling, the warrior nodded. "Fair enough."
**********
Opening her eyes, Xena frowned and looked around the dark room. Sighing, she rubbed her
eyes, then closed them again and was almost asleep, when the noise that woke her up in the
first place came again. "If thats Bud, Im gonna kill him." Opening
her mouth wide, she yawned and grabbed the pillow under her head, then lifted
Gabrielles arm from across her shoulders. Sliding sideways, she replaced her body
with the pillow and hunted for her robe, then pulled it on and wrapped it tightly around
her waist, tying it off. Grumbling under her breath, the warrior stumbled her way to the
door and took a moment to clear her head, before opening it a little. Peeking out, she saw
a dim light reflecting off the hall wall and frowned again, as she opened the door enough
for her to slip out and closed it softly behind her. Walking bare foot, she saw the couch
come into view and Ts head with it and an orange glow put out by the fire in the
fireplace. Shuffling into the living room, she ran her fingers through her tousled hair.
"What are you doing down here? Wheres Ares?"
Looking up, T smiled. "Hes upstairs asleep."
"How did you get down here?" Her face in a perpetual frown, she walked around
the couch to take a seat on the table, next to Ts propped feet.
"I slid down the banister." Chuckling, the god held up a hand when her friend
jumped up. "Im kidding. Im kidding. I walked, slowly and carefully down
the stairs." Waving for the warrior to sit back down, she shook her head.
"Youre so easy." She said this to Bud, who was laying on the couch beside
her, with his head in her lap and was snoring.
Crossing her legs, Xena pulled her robe around her neck in a huff. "What are you
doing up? Its the middle of the night." Switching from a frown, she put on a
concerned look. "Is there something wrong with the baby?"
"No." Shaking her head, T smiled. "The babys fine."
"Then whats wrong?" Sitting forward, she gave her friend a studied stare.
"Nothing is wrong, Xena. I like coming down here when its quiet. Its as
close as I get to being outside." She said, with a shrug and gave Buds neck a
scratch. "I miss that. The stars, the smell of the trees, the sounds around me.
Sometimes I just come down here to think about those things."
Sighing, Xena smiled. "Youre like a tiger in a cage. Im sorry."
Perking up, Bud looked around.
"I wasnt talking to you, go back to sleep." Leaning forward, she pushed
his head back down.
"Dont be sorry. Its the best for the baby and Ill get out, one
day." Chuckling, she nodded toward the hall. "Go back to bed. Youve got a
big day tomorrow."
"Xena?" Staggering out of their room, Gabrielle had on her best I hate
that Im awake and its all your fault face. She also had on her robe, but
it was wrong side out.
"Oooo. Thats an interesting hair style." Biting her lip, T held in a laugh
and tried to ignore the blonde hair sticking out in a hundred different directions.
Xena gave Ts leg a slap, then turned to the bard. "Were in here,
Gabrielle. Go back to bed. Ill be there in a few minutes."
Pouting a sleepy pout, the bard continued to trudge toward the couch. "Whats
the matter?" Rubbing her head, she did the impossible, which was make her head look
even more frightening. "Move." Giving Bud a shove, she pushed him out of the way
and took his place. Curling up into a ball, she laid down, placing her head in Ts
lap. "Is there a problem with the baby?" Closing her eyes, she tugged her robe
tighter around her shoulders.
Shaking her head, T patted the couch on the other side of her. "No. Theres
nothing wrong with the baby." She said softly and began straightening out the unruly
blonde hair. "Xena and I were just talking. Why dont you go back to bed?"
Frowning, Gabrielle reached for a cushion, from behind her back and put it under her head.
"Thats a I just got comfortable and stop annoying me move."
Smiling, Xena got up and took her place beside T. "Shes not a night person
either." Tucking her feet to the side, she leaned over, putting her head on her
friends shoulder.
"So I remember." Smiling down on the face of slightly annoyed, she went back to
trying to get some order into Gabrielles hair.
Wrinkling her forehead, the bard reached up and grabbed Ts hand, then held onto it
and brought it down to tuck under her chin.
Rolling her eyes, T laid her head back. "Are you ready for tomorrow?"
"Yea." Nodding her head, Xena closed her eyes. "Weve got the council
room set up and Ares put all the multimedia equipment in and Aphrodite said shed
provide the food."
"Shes cooking?" Lifting her head, the god looked worried.
"No." Fluffing her pillow, Gabrielle smiled. "Shes delivering food
that we picked out of a couple of take out menus. Itll be an international
buffet."
"Wooo. You had me scared for a minute." Sighing, T laid her head back again.
"And weve got unbreakable plates and glasses." Adding the extra note, the
warrior smiled. "We didnt want to risk your best plates with Bud running
around."
Growling, from his spot underneath Ts legs, Bud took a swipe at Xenas
appendages.
"Stop that." Smacking his paw, she chuckled. "I was kidding."
Sneezing a couple of times, he went back to sleep.
"Is he allergic to something?" Rubbing her nose in sympathy, Gabrielle opened
her eyes to look down at the striped cat.
"No." Smiling, the god shook her head. "Hes just unamused by
Xenas attempt at humor."
"Oh." Nodding, she closed her eyes again. "Just checking."
"Are you two going back to bed, or should I get comfortable?" Nudging the
warrior with her elbow, T got one blue eye to open.
"Are we bothering you?" Gabrielle asked and turned her head to open her eyes.
"No, I was just checking." Giving her friend a wink, she smiled. "Its
been awhile since I had you two fall asleep on me and Id forgotten what the signals
were."
Closing her eye, Xena smiled. "We did do that, didnt we?"
"Frequently." T nodded.
"Huh." Disagreeing, the bard shook her head and rolled it back over. "Not
that frequently. We couldnt get you out of the trees for the first couple of years
that we knew you. It used to keep me awake, wondering how you stayed up there."
"I slept in a bed when I was here." Defending herself, the god thumped a blonde
head. "And unless your snoring was the sound of your gears turning, Id say that
I didnt make you miss too many zs."
"I dont snore." Tugging on the hand under her chin, Gabrielle protested.
"Yes, you do." Xena smiled. "Its not loud, but its there and
dont try to tell me I dont know what Im talking about, because Ive
been listening to it for over two thousand years."
"That was you." Pointing a blind finger in her direction, she waggled it at the
source of the noise.
"I do not snore." Smacking the finger down.
"Yes, you do." T contended. "On cold nights, when I did sleep on the
ground, it was like listening to buzz saws in stereo. One on each side."
"Oh!" Growling, Xena smacked her arm. "And what about you?"
"What about me?" Shaking her head, the god chuckled. "I was hunted all my
life, Xena. If I snored, I would've been dead a long time ago, so dont even try that
one."
"Huh. Shes got ya there." Smiling, Gabrielle craned her neck to give the
warrior another finger waving.
"You shut up." Rolling her eyes, she put her head back down on her muscled
pillow.
Chuckling, the bard brought her finger back and got comfortable again. Closing her eyes,
she twitched her nose, then rubbed it and sighed. "This is nice."
"Well, it has its draw backs." Sticking her tongue out, Xena closed her
eyes, then threaded one arm through Ts and smiled.
Looking from one sleepy face to another, T chuckled softly. Crossing her legs at the
ankles, she laid her head back and closed her eyes as well and groaned when a soft nasal
sound started buzzing in her ear. Sighing, she lifted her head when the surround sound
started from her lap and she looked down at a her tummy. "I tell you what, Junior
Mint. You can learn a lot from these two, but do me a favor and make sure snoring
isnt one of them."
**********
"Are you sure these are all right?" Looking down at her plain white t-shirt and
Levis, Gabrielle thought heirs to the throne should be a little more professional
for their first appearance at an official function. "I brought my dress suits."
Tying her white Nikes, she glanced up to see Ts grin.
"Gabrielle, its fine. I wore basically the same thing to the last three
conferences." Sitting on the couch, that she hadnt moved off in far too long, T
smiled. "None of the elders are going to have suits on, so why should you?"
"Personally, I think suits should be banned as a whole." Nodding, Xena pulled on
her cowboy boots. Stomping them into place, she stood and smoothed out her Levis.
"Of course, if it makes you happy, we could have Yes, I really am an heir
printed across the front." Pointing at her chest and her white t-shirt.
"I think Gabrielles should say Im with stupid, with one of
those big fingers pointing to you." Ares commented and got a steely blue glare.
Chuckling, the bard got a glare also and rolled her eyes. "Well, if everybody else is
going casual, then I guess itll do." Bouncing on her toes, she tested out her
new Nikes.
"Good." Smiling, T picked up the laptop beside her and held it up. "Here is
everything I could think of that youd need for any stray topics that werent
covered in the books."
"Youre kidding me." Taking the slim computer, Xena looked at it amazed.
"Theres more?" As her brain rebelled at the very notion of trying to stuff
more information into it, the warrior stared wide eyed, with the slightest hint of fear.
"Just obscure stuff and there are a couple of video games. Just in case it gets
really boring." Chuckling, the god folded her hands behind her head and propped her
feet on the table.
"Ill take that." Snatching the laptop from the warrior, Gabrielle smiled
at her. "Ill just hang on to this so I dont have to kill you when the
little beeps and chirps start interrupting my speech." Smiling smugly.
Frowning for a second, she snapped her fingers and went running out of the room. "I
forgot the speeches."
Sitting up, she leaned forward to check the warriors location, then grinned.
"Gabrielle, theres the latest cd-rom Xena game on there too, if youre
interested." Whispering, T gave her a wink.
"Ooooo. Thanks." Smiling, she patted the black toy. "Ill keep that in
mind."
"Got em." Smiling triumphantly, Xena came trotting back into the room.
"Here." Handing the bard her speech, she folded her own into a square, then
shoved it in her back pocket. "You ready?" Flicking her eyebrows at the blonde.
Checking the items in her possession, Gabrielle sighed. "Looks like it."
Smiling, she turned to glance at the front door, when somebody knocked.
"Ill get it." Getting up, Ares walked toward the door. "Its
Cargan and the Royal Guard."
"Royal Guard?" Giving the King an incredulous stare, the warrior scowled along
with it.
"Its traditional for the King to be escorted to the council room." Rolling
her eyes, T shook her head. "He just loves showing off. I have no idea where he gets
it from." Sighing, she waved the event off. "Just go with it. It makes him
happy."
Opening the door, Ares smiled at the Captain of the Royal Guard in his full blown shiny
get up. "Cargan."
Snapping his heels together, Cargan bowed. "The Royal Guard is here to escort the
Royal Heirs to the throne of the King of the Ungara to the council room, when theyre
ready." Straightening his body to a rigid stance, he smiled. "Are they
ready?"
As two heirs leaned way over to get a look at the Captain, they smiled. "How long did
it take him to polish that armor?" Xena asked with a chuckle.
"Suddenly, Im feeling completely underdressed." Smiling, Gabrielle
chuckled as well, taking in the full formal visage of the Captain.
Puffing out his chest, which really couldnt be seen under the armor, Cargan stood
proud and tall.
Shaking her head, T got up. "Cagan, wheres Chris?"
"Present and accounted for." He said, slipping past the statue that was his
father. "Ive got everything set up. The computers have been networked to the
Hub and the video equipment is ready to go." Smiling, he gave the girls a nod.
"Now all we need are the Heirs."
"Video equipment?" Turning to look at T, Gabrielle arched an eyebrow.
"The conferences are saved on DVD for the Archives". Nodding, the god gave the
girls a final once over. "Dont worry, its not being broadcast. Its
just for future reference." Picking a piece of lint off Xenas shoulder, she
gave it a swipe. "Ready?" Looking up into crystal blue.
"Yea." Nodding, Xena smiled. "Ive got my sidekick." Turning her
head, she smiled at Gabrielle. "You ready?"
Clutching the laptop, she smiled. "Ready, warrior princess." Winking, she held
out her hand.
"Then lets kick some conference butt." Taking her hand, the warrior turned
again, to give T a smile. "Youre going to stay here and rest, right? No
sneaking down there to check up on us." Waving a free finger at her friend and
patient.
"Xena, if I didnt believe in you, Id never have made you my heirs in the
first place." Standing on her tip toes, T pulled the brunette down to kiss her
forehead. "My empire is in good hands."
"Thanks." Nodding, she watched the god give the bard a kiss on the forehead.
"Thanks, T." Smiling, Gabrielle took a deep breath and let it out through a set
of puffed cheeks.
"Thank you." Brushing some hair out of her eyes, T smiled. "For putting up
with my mood swings and for doing this. I know its been hard on both of you and I
want you to know how much it means to me that you care enough to do this."
"Oh, dont start her crying." Whining, Xena saw the first hint of a tear
puddling up. "She wont stop and then Ill start and well go in there
with blood shot eyes." Stomping a cowboy booted foot, she felt a puddle forming as
well.
"Sorry." Smiling, the god stepped out of their way and pointed toward the door.
"Your audience awaits."
Chuckling, the bard sniffed and wiped her nose. "Okay, Im ready."
"Good." Walking past her, Xena pulled Gabrielle behind when her arm reached
its maximum stretch capacity. "Come on."
Giving T a goodbye wave, Gabrielle smiled. "Well be back."
"Thanks for the warning." Waving back, T smiled and watched her best friends and
heirs depart. When Ares closed the door, she returned to her place on the couch and
propped up her feet. "I wonder if Ill be able to hear Xena yell from
here?" Smiling up at the father of her baby, she pulled Ares down beside her.
"Well, if you dont. Youll definitely feel the ground shake."
Laughing, Ares wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "Is this place earthquake
safe?"
"Well find out in a few minutes." Closing her eyes, the god listened
carefully and waited for the ground to shake. When both happened, she burst into laughter.
"Yea, its safe."
"T! Im gonna kill you!" Xena screamed at the top of her lungs and stared
at a room full of half naked clan elders, who were pelting her with pea shooters.
"Great ice breaker." Gabrielle chuckled and held the laptop up as a shield.
**********
The End.
Epilogue: Once the battle was concluded, which took quite some time, since most of it was
spent with Xena picking up tiny projectiles and hurtling them back at the elders,
Gabrielle managed to calm the warrior down enough to save T from execution and the
conference got under way. It went well, with nobody getting food poisoning, when the
seafood salad Aphrodite delivered was still flipping around in the bowl and due to the
pairs long hours of preparation, they served their friend well by proving to the
elders that they were both deserving of their positions and more than capable of running
the empire, to which they were heirs. They also concluded the conference early, by a week,
because Xena took charge and didnt put up with people that rambled and got off into
never never land with their remarks. Which didnt make those ramblers very happy when
they got yelled at, but just like the people in the Hub, the elders came to appreciate the
warrior princess, with her many skills and the sidekick, who was always there to do the
same thing to the former warlord when she started rambling. So, since they were left with
some spare time, T proposed a contest, for everyone to participate in, to see who could
get the highest score on the Xena game. And so, after two thousand years of waiting, Xena
finally got to take T on in hand to hand combat, via her remote control. As to who won?
Well, thats one for the Archives and is better left to the preference of the reader.
Okay, it was Gabrielle.
Thanks for reading.
FlyBigD