DISCLAIMER: Xena: Warrior Princess, Gabrielle, Argo and all other characters who have appeared in the syndicated series Xena: Warrior Princess, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of StudiosUSA and Renaissance Pictures. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fan fiction. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices. Please do not use any portion of this story, in whole or in part, without the permission of the author.
ATTACK OF THE 50FT BARD
BY Djwp
Cover by Ciegra
Part III
A large foot descended into the street. And then another. Goats scattered. Chickens squawked and fluttered. Horses neighed and bucked, ripping their reins from posts and fleeing in panic. Villagers ran in every direction, picking up children and scurrying away down side streets in an effort to find shelter.
Gabrielle stomped down the main thoroughfare of Amphipolis, her shadow eclipsing the sun as she passed. Her left hand was clenched in an angry fist and in her right hand, she carried one very perturbed Warrior Princess.
"Gabrielle, you put me down right now!" Xena squirmed within the fingers that held her. "Do you hear me? I'm getting mad!" She squirmed again, but the grip held tight. "Really mad!"
"Forget it, Xena," the bard stated, and stepped to avoid a scroll merchant. She chose instead to crush the stand of a fabric vendor. He had cheated her last visit, she recalled, and she watched him dive for cover with great satisfaction, remembering the two for one silk scarf bargain that turned out to be three times as expensive. Swindler, she thought as she stepped heel to toe and crushed the stand with the ball of her giant left foot.
Xena looked down at the wreckage as they passed and watched the silky contents of the vendor's stand blow across the city in the wind. "You're out of control, Gabrielle! Let me down!"
"HA! Look who's talking? I'm not the one sleeping with the enemy!"
"What are you talking about? I haven't slept with anyone!"
"And I'm mad about THAT, too!"
The bard took a long stride through an alley, ripping a myriad of clotheslines in her wake. Clothes pins snapped, the lines popped and laundry fluttered to the ground.
"Gabrielle, you're not yourself." Xena said, and then winced at the sound of shattering stone. Her gigantic friend had just stepped on and pulverized the statue of one of Amphipolis's founding fathers. The warrior uncovered her eyes and looked down at the pile of marble dust left behind.
"Never did like that ugly thing." She strained her small body in the large hand, twisting in an effort to look at her partner. "Ga ... bri ... elle, where are you taking me?"
"Away from him!" The bard paused, eyes easily searching over the rooftops across the entire city.
Xena pounded on a big thumb in frustration. "What IS it with you, lately?"
"You were kissing him!"
"I wasn't kissing him, for Michael's sake, I was under a spell."
"Then it was a good thing I came along." Gabrielle stopped and lifted the warrior up to face level. "Just in case, you better let me take care of Mr. Tall, Dark, and Dangerous. You stay here, away from his spell. I'll take care of him, then I'll be back to take care of you." Carefully, she put Xena down on the very tippy top of tallest structure in Amphipolis.
One foot slipped on the tile, and Xena found herself grabbing at a weather vane, the only handhold on the small, sharply slanted roof of the city's bell tower.
The warrior look down ... it was a long way to the ground. "You are NOT going to leave me here!"
"I most certainly am. And you are going to stay here, too. When I come back, we're going to work this out, once and for all."
"What? Work what out?" Xena slipped again and swung around for better footing.
Gabrielle checked carefully, making sure her warrior would be safe and sound. "You'll be fine. Just hold on." She nodded, satisfied. The giant bard smiled tenderly at her partner. "I love you, Xena." And she turned and walked away.
"Gabrielle, you get back here right now!"
Xena watched, furious, as the giant bard took long, lumbering steps away.
"I mean it! Right now!"
At no response, Xena tried a different tack.
"I love you, too, Gabrielle. You know I do! It's always been you -- you know that!"
But the bard pointedly ignored her.
To Hades with the sensitive chat. "You're under a spell too, ya know!" Now, she was mad. "And it's not just that you're too big for your britches! You're JEALOUS to match! JEALOUS! JEALOUS! JEALOUS!"
Gabrielle stepped over a row of houses, and the warrior suddenly realized that not only had Gabrielle gotten more jealous, she had gotten bigger ... a lot bigger.
Xena thought of the djinn's threat regarding her partner's growth and the lack of air up there, and found her own worry growing beyond measure.
"Goddamn it, Gabrielle! Whadda ya think you're gonna do with the djinn once you find him, step on him?" Xena yelled in one last, frustrated effort, cursing as her foot slipped again. She tightened her grip and looked down at the ground from atop the small, pointed roof. It was a long, long, long drop down and her only hand-hold was beginning to bend.
Xena got her balance and looked across the city for her partner. The golden head was easily seen, lumbering for her brother's tavern.
"Why now?" She watched as her partner walked into certain danger. "Why all of a sudden so jealous now?"
Then a thought suddenly occurred. Gabrielle wasn't the only one walking around with 50 feet worth of jealousy. The djinn had told her he wanted Gabrielle for himself, and it had set her off in a rage. No, the djinn wasn't interested in Gabrielle at all. He wasn't interested in Xena, Warrior Princess, either. And Aphrodite knows, she certainly wasn't interested in Jan bin Jan. No, the djinn was after something else and using the two of them to get it.
"We're playing right into his hands," the warrior stated through tight lips, thinking of her own actions and her partner's. They were both behaving exactly as the djinn probably anticipated they would.
Chaos, she thought. He thrives on chaos.
"Okay, Jan bin Jan, you want chaos -- you got it." Xena looked down at the ground and plotted her descent. "This is gonna hurt you a lot more than it's gonna hurt me." She adjusted her grip and took a deep breath. "I hope."
And with one long ululating, warrior-princess patented cry, she jumped.
******
Xena descended like a big, heavy rock, falling down along the wall of the tower even faster than she had anticipated. Shifting mid-air, she pushed off against the clay wall. The speed of her momentum shot her out at sharp angle and she hit the side of the adjacent building with her feet. She pushed off against the wall, spinning in a more controlled descent and aimed for an awning. It caught her and bounced her up once, and then twice. She flipped onto her back and fell back to the awning, expecting it to catch her the third time, but she ripped right through the fabric and crashed against the thin wooden ceiling of a chicken coup.
The weak pine cracked easily on impact and the warrior fell through, landing with a puff in a pile of chicken nests, feathers, and poop.
"Ugh!" Xena groaned as she lifted her head, then grimaced at the sound of cracking eggs under her butt. "I hate it when that happens," she said and blew a feather off the tip of her nose.
******
Jan bin Jan rose up from the floor. The giant bard having departed, he had transformed himself back into the handsome, dark gentlemen who had been sitting quietly with the tavern owner sharing an ale.
"Would anyone like to place an order?" he asked the crowd, smiling wickedly.
Toris held on to his wife protectively, both of their eyes staring wide in terror at the man standing before them. The rest of the tavern crowd shifted nervously, not knowing whether to stand perfectly still or bolt.
"Get out of my tavern!" Toris finally ordered. His customers jumped at the yell and started to run.
"Not you, you idiots! Him!" His patrons froze, once again unsure of what to do.
"Not too good for business," the djinn commented with a snicker, "Do you wish me to go?"
"What I wish is that I had never set eyes on you in the first place!"
The djinn rolled his head, "Oh, this is just too easy," he stated and then groaned in absolute delight.
Toris's hands flew to his eyes. "I can't see! I can't see!"
He let go of his wife, reaching out as though trying to grasp onto his eyesight which had just drifted away.
Nicholaa stared at her husband in terror, and then the ground suddenly shook, throwing her off balance. And then shook again. And when the ground lurched one more time, Nicholaa grabbed her hair and screamed out in horror.
The djinn threw back his head and laughed with resounding glee.
"Here djinny, djinny, djinny!"
The ground shook with another step as Gabrielle called out, searching for her prey.
The djinn's eyes lifted as a huge, dark shadow filled the roofless tavern. This time, every customer in the tavern dove for cover wherever they could find it.
"Where is everyone going? The fun is just beginning!" he said with a malevolent smile and disappeared.
Gabrielle's face peered into the hole in the roof. "Where is he?"
A large hand reached in and started moving around the table and chairs, searching for the dark, handsome man who had dared to seduce her partner.
Villagers screamed, their shelter suddenly ripped away as the enormous hand groped for its prey.
"I know you're in there! You can't hide from me!"
The hand withdrew and was replaced by the enormous face.
"I'll find you if I have to rip this whole city apart to do it!"
The face disappeared and then suddenly the remaining portion of the roof was torn away. Splintered wood fell into the tavern, and Toris's wife screamed again, then ran, leaving her husband to fend for himself.
"Nicholaa! Nicholaa!" Toris felt his way, bumping into a chair. A beam crashed to the ground, just missing him to one side. "Gabrielle! For Gods sake! What are you doing?"
The bard looked in and watched as the tiny innkeeper tripped over the beam.
"I've had it with your sister, Toris!" Gabrielle stated, and picked up a table, tossing it to the side to see if the djinn was hiding behind it. She found only a man and a woman cowering in fear. The bard left them alone, her eyes searching for another possible hiding spot. "She's gonna have to decide. It's me or the foot pathway."
Again, the djinn's delighted laughter rang out.
"I can hear you!" the bard yelled, and her search continued in earnest. She ripped up a piece of the bar, crushing it in her hand. "You're in here, I know it!"
Toris found a pole and held on for dear life. "Gabrielle! I'm blind, you're 50 feet tall, there's some kind of demon loose in Amphipolis and you're tearing apart my tavern trying to find him! Why is it every time you two come into town, you bring chaos with you?!"
Chaos? Chaos? Hadn't Xena told her the djinn feeds off of chaos? Gabrielle paused at Toris's words, her eyes clearing of rage for a moment. The djinn flickered into visibility, as though his power was fading.
"No!" Xena's yell got everyone's attention. She flipped over some rubble and landed in the middle of the room. "Don't stop! Keep it comin', Gabrielle!"
Toris turned his head, recognizing his sister's voice. "Xena, is that you?"
The green rage of jealousy returned to the bard's eyes. "I thought I told you to stay put!"
"Come on, Gabrielle. Don't lose that anger now!" She looked up at her partner and pointed at the now visible djinn. "There he is! Go get him!"
"What? Are you crazy, Xena?!" Toris took a step to run for his sister, but slipped on a piece of tile.
Gabrielle turned her attention to the djinn, but was unsure of what to do. Her hand lifted, poised to attack, but wavered with uncertainty.
Xena ran to a man who was cowering in the corner and lifted him by his shoulders. "Come on! Get up! Make a wish, any wish. Whatever wish you make right now will be granted. Hurry up and make one!" She pushed him toward the djinn.
The man shifted nervously, not knowing what to do.
"For cripes sake, make a wish!" The warrior yelled.
The villager jumped at the order. "I wish I was wealthy," he shouted tentatively.
Bags of gold fell, and kept on falling.
The sight of money brought a number of villagers scrambling to their feet.
"I wish I was the most beautiful woman on earth," a woman said, eyes wide with fear. She transformed into Cleopatra, then Aphrodite, then Helen of Troy, then Xena herself and kept on transforming.
"I wish I owned land!" A man yelled out. Suddenly, he held in his hands the deeds to thousands of acreage. Another moment later the tax collector tapped him on the shoulder.
"I wish I was Hercules!" A teenager called out, and was instantly transformed into the legendary hero.
One look at the demi-god and the giant bard flew into a rampage.
"Not this time, big boy!" Gabrielle bellowed and continued her destruction of the tavern anew.
"That's my girl," Xena beamed proudly and dove for cover.
Throughout Amphipolis, pandemonium reigned, as a city full of frivolous desires begged to be granted.
All the while, the djinn moaned in the throes of ecstasy, bombarded by an avalanche of wishes and unable to do anything but grant them.
Jan bin Jan ripped open his shirt in delight as a steady diet of chaos fed him. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined that bedlam could feel so good. It was better than anything he could have ever wished for. His body trembled as wish after wish flowed to and through him, his power pulsating as each one manifested. Like an endless field of flowers blooming all at once, the beauty of it all was overwhelming.
Xena rolled to avoid a sudden downpour of golden ducats as yet another villager wished for wealth, and landed neatly on her feet. She glanced quickly at her partner. Gabrielle was tearing a wall of the tavern down in an effort to get to the wanna-be Hercules. The tavern shook as her hand ripped at the timbers and long fingers reached in, trying to grab at the mini-demi god. The poor man was running at full tilt, ducking to avoid the large hand that was grabbing for him, not expecting that his secret desire to be just like the handsome hero would earn him a giant bard's wrath.
"Hey, Hercules!" Xena yelled, and both hero and bard paused, "Lookin' good!" Xena said, smiling.
Gabrielle's eyes grew wide. "Oh no you don't!" She swatted for the villager, who barely managed to jump beyond reach.
"You go, Gabrielle," the warrior said, smiling as she watched. "You're beautiful when you're angry."
A child flew by with griffin wings, and another ran past with the legs of a chicken. The situation was quickly spiraling out of control. Xena turned to the dark man at the center of it all and grinned. He was triumphant in his ecstasy and completely unaware of his surroundings, granting wish after wish almost in pure reflex.
Xena sauntered up behind the djinn and put her arms around him. Oblivious to her presence, he leaned back into the warrior, adding the intensity of the embrace to his mounting pleasure. She placed her lips just at his ear and smiled seductively.
"I wish Mikos had never touched a drop of ale in his life," she whispered soft and low.
Jan bin Jan moaned as the wish passed through him, and then his eyes shot open in anger.
"NO!"
He growled and lifted powerful arms up, pushing the warrior from him. Xena was tossed away by the force and crashed into a pile of broken tables and chairs against the wall. She slid to the floor with a grunt.
"NO!"
A wind spiraled through the room, lifting debris as though sucking it into a vacuum. Xena's dark hair whipped around and she crouched, shielding her eyes from the swirling dirt. She watched as the magical storm grew, whipping through the room, pulling coin and gold, deeds and dresses with it. The vortex flowed, picking up speed, faster and faster. It swirled in the center of the room building like a tornado, sucking up all signs of any wishes granted, and spiraling down into the djinn's very heart, the center of the maelstrom. The vortex churned, increasing in intensity and began to glow so brightly, the warrior could bare it no more and had to look away.
"NOOOOOOO!" Jan bin Jan bellowed one final time, his deep voice rising above the tempest of disintegrating wishes.
And then the tornado imploded, collapsing into itself and down into the djinn, finally disappearing with a loud ...
POP!
The tornado was gone and the djinn had vanished right along with it.
Xena lifted her arm away from her eyes, afraid to look. The quiet after the chaos was almost deafening.
Toris's tavern appeared to be perfectly normal. Dim in the shade of the fading afternoon light, the inn looked as though nothing had happened ... not a thing had happened at all.
Xena stood quickly, her eyes scanning the room. "Gabrielle?" she asked hurriedly, searching the room in a panic. "Gabrielle!"
Toris stared at his hands in relief and then glanced around the inn. Everything was back to normal -- absolutely everything. Tables and chairs were back in their upright position. Drinks were served without so much as a drop having been spilled. Even the roof was back, no evidence of it having been torn away remained at all.
"Nicholaa!" Toris yelled and then sighed in relief when he found his wife standing right beside him with the same incredulous expression on her face.
In the rear of the tavern, a young teenager whimpered. He was no longer Hercules.
Back in Nigrita, an aging woman was staring at the empty mantle of a fireplace, wondering how she got there and why her arthritis suddenly hurt so much.
Gaulus shook his head to clear away the cobwebs. He found himself standing in the middle Heliodoro the sculptor's house, and his wife hadn't been tugging on the artist's toga at all.
Brutus was, once again, only a dog and more than happy to be curled in Oretha's lap.
And Thyra? Thyra was sitting on the same stool, in her new bodice, no longer feeling like the ugliest woman in town. A short, heavy, pimple-faced man had just walked up to her. He was uglier than she, but he had smiled at her and she had smiled at him, and that was all she really needed to feel beautiful.
"Xena," Toris put his arms around Nicholaa and stared at his sister disapprovingly, "Would you mind telling me just what the heck is going on?"
Xena completely ignored her brother. She rushed through the room, avoiding confused customers, bewildered villagers, and even pushing aside the ex-mini-demi-god in a hurried effort to get outside.
"Gabrielle!"
She pushed through swinging doors and ran out into the street.
Her heart leapt at the sight of her bard standing there, a bit dazed and confused ... but tan and blond, short and sassy, just the way she liked her.
"Gabrielle," Xena said with a breath of relief as she rushed over to wrap the woman up in her arms. "I'll never make fun of your height again, I promise." She kissed the top of a golden head and hugged her hard.
"Xena, what's going on? What happened? What did you do? What happened to the djinn?"
Xena rocked her companion as she continued to hug her. "You're back to normal. I made a wish. And if what I wished for came true, then the djinn is back in his statue," she replied, happily answering the typical barrage of questions in the same order asked.
Gabrielle pulled away slightly, very content to have to, once again, look up to see her partner's bright, blue eyes. "But what did you wish for to make it all right?"
"My only wish is that you sell lots of plays 'cause its gonna be expensive for us to live in Athens, you know."
The grin on Gabrielle's face grew into a smile so big, it crinkled her nose. She leaned her head against Xena's shoulder and hugged her long and hard.
********
Toris pushed back in his chair with a grunt of disbelief. "Xena, I would say that was the tallest tale I ever heard, but ...."
"But what?" Gabrielle interrupted defensively, anticipating the first of what would probably be many height jokes.
"But I should know where you two are concerned, all tales are tall tales."
Xena chuckled and took a nice long drink of her Mom's best ale thinking, not for the first time, how much she missed her.
Gabrielle narrowed her eyes at her partner. "Xena, how did you know what to wish for? Why did wishing that Mikos wasn't a drunk set everything back to normal?"
Xena swallowed and wiped her lips with the back of her hand, clearing her sad thoughts away. "Well, for one thing, everyone's wishes had been centered around themselves. I knew if I was going to make a wish, I needed to make sure it had nothing to do with me."
The bard nodded, thinking. "Okay, I could see how that could work. But why Mikos?"
Xena shrugged, "I just figured Mikos had broken up that statue in a drunken rage. If he never drank, then ..."
"Then the statue would have never gotten smashed ..."
"And the djinn would never have been released. We would still be here, but there would never have been any wishes made .... "
"So, no wishes granted," Gabrielle finished, smiling proudly. "But this means that the djinn wasn't destroyed, he's still stuck in the statue."
Xena lifted her mug and finished off the rest of her ale. "Yea," she replied when she was done. "We're gonna have to go out and have a talk with Mikos about that, right after ..."
"Right after what?" the bard queried.
"Right after I have some more of my brother's great ale." Xena rose and smiled at Toris. "Okay if we stay for dinner, brother?"
"Sure, fine with me," Toris answered, grinning up at his sister. "You two could stay the night if you want."
"Sounds good to me." Xena looked down at Gabrielle, who nodded her head in agreement. "It's settled then, a night in a real bed for Xena and her girlfriend." And with that announcement, Xena turned and strode to the back kitchen in search of another keg of ale.
"Well, you two seem to be doing well," Toris commented with a smile, pleasantly surprised by the uncharacteristically happy gait in his sister's walk as she strolled away.
Gabrielle grunted. "Easy for you to say."
Toris looked at the bard with concern. "You mean you guys aren't?"
"No, it's not that," Gabrielle replied, playing with her mug, "It's just that things get confusing at times, you know? One moment we're this couple, and the next we're not. I just wish I knew what direction we were headed."
Toris nodded in understanding. "My sister is not an easy woman to love."
"You said a mouthful," Gabrielle commented, taking a mouthful of ale. "Or understand." She put her mug down and leaned forward. "Take this for example: the whole reason I grew big was because of what I had wished for in front of the djinn. You know, the 'be careful what you wish for' thing?"
Toris nodded, trying to comprehend. "What exactly did you wish for, Gabrielle?"
"That's what I don't understand," Gabrielle stated, moving closer to Toris to be sure her partner couldn't hear. "I wished that I could be as open about our relationship as Xena is, you know? Then, I wouldn't have half the problems with things that I'm having right now. The djinn granted my wish all right, but I was jealous as all outdoors, if you get my meaning. I don't get it."
Toris leaned back in his chair, amazed. "Are you kidding me, Gabrielle? Is that what you wished for? That you could be as jealous about Xena as she is about you?"
"Well, yes, not in so many words, but that's the gist of it," Gabrielle replied, watching Toris's reaction closely.
"Well, if that don't beat all," Toris slapped the table and laughed.
"What's so funny?"
When Toris only laughed harder, the bard became annoyed. "Come on, Toris, what are you laughing at?"
"Gabrielle," Toris swallowed and caught his breath, "my sister gets more jealous when someone comes on to you than the green eyed monster himself."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about my sister, Xena, that's who. Why, she'd chop a person's hand off if they touched you. Poke their eyes if they even looked at you."
"She does not."
"Okay, so maybe she doesn't do all that, but believe me, Xena was never good at sharing ... never. And she certainly isn't good at sharing you. I should know."
"What do you mean, you should know?"
"You know," Toris began and leaned forward. He certainly didn't want his sister to hear this. "When we first met, I thought you were kinda cute."
Gabrielle snorted in disbelief. "You did?"
"Oh yeah. I mentioned it to Xena." Toris looked down at his arm and started to roll up his sleeve. "I think I still have the bruise on my arm from where she grabbed me and held me up against the tree. She warned me in, no uncertain terms, that I was definitely not your type. No, I was not your type at all. And if I knew what was good for me, I would never be your type."
He continued to pull up his sleeve, smiling, but Gabrielle stopped him. "No, no, I believe you. But, it just doesn't make sense."
"Come on, Gabrielle," Toris sighed, taking the bard's hand in his own. "Xena may be many things, but one thing she is not is a dreamer. My sister is pragmatic -- almost to a fault. You of all people should know that. She would never allow the fact that she loves you beyond all reason to interfere with what she believes to be the right thing to do. The greater good, Gabrielle -- it extends even to her relationship with you." Toris leaned back in his chair, releasing Gabrielle's hand. "Don't be fooled by the brave face. She gets jealous as all Hades. Believe me, I've seen it ... and more than once. She's just better at hiding it than you are."
"Hmph." Gabrielle turned her head to the kitchen and stared at the door her partner had just disappeared through, thinking.
"Toris," she said, standing. "I'll be right back."
******
"Xena?" Gabrielle peeked into the kitchen, looking for her partner. She found her struggling to muscle a large barrel of ale around so she could get to the spout.
"Yeah?" Xena replied, without turning.
Gabrielle entered the kitchen and closed the door. "You do get jealous, don't you?"
Xena paused in her pursuit of another drink. "Huh?"
The bard scratched her chin and stepped into the room. "I guess I never realized it, but you do get jealous. You don't like seeing me with someone else just as much as I don't like seeing you ... with someone else, I mean."
Xena abandoned her quest, leaving the barrel of ale right where it was, and slowly turned around. "Gabrielle, what are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about us." The bard walked up to a table and nervously played with a pan of nutbread that was cooling on a rack. "Neither of us really wants to see the other with somebody else, do we?"
Xena sighed and walked over. "Of course I don't enjoy seeing you with someone else. But that's not the issue, is it?"
"Then what is?"
"The real issue is what's best, isn't it?" Xena took a deep breath. "Think about all you've been through, Gabrielle ..."
"All we've been through," the bard interjected.
"All right. All we've been through. Death, war, monsters, gods, crucifixion, more death, more monsters, djinns-- it goes on and on and on, and it never seems to stop." The warrior placed a large hand on her small friend's shoulder. "And I don't think it ever will."
"And your point is?"
The warrior gave an exasperated sigh. "My point is, Gabrielle, one day you will get tired of all this. One day, you'll want something better for your life than Greek tragedy and chaos. And when that day comes, you will leave me, and you know what?"
"What?"
"It will be the right thing to do ... for you."
Gabrielle frowned. "But not for you."
"It doesn't matter what's right for me," Xena replied firmly.
"Yes, it does."
"No, it doesn't."
"Well, it does to me!" Gabrielle shrugged the hand away. "Xena, we have been through a lot, it's true. But, we've been through it together. You and I."
Xena raised an eyebrow. "And your point is?"
"My point is, I'm well aware of what life with you is like. And I'm also well aware of what is right for me. And you know what, Xena?"
"What?"
"I choose you." Gabrielle poked her finger in the middle of Xena's chest.
The warrior looked down at the stubborn finger and smirked. "You do, huh?"
"Yeah, I do," Gabrielle repeated, smiling. The poking finger relaxed and Gabrielle rested her hand on the warm skin just above the armor guarding Xena's heart. "It's always been you."
The corners of Xena's mouth lifted into a grin. "Well, for what it's worth, it's always been you, too."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really."
Gabrielle could feel the tension between them building. Xena had a way of staring in her eyes that simply made her heart stop beating. Before she did something embarrassing, the bard let her hand drop from the warm place it was resting and promptly knocked the pan of freshly baked nutbread over, sending it spilling all over the floor.
"Oh, for the love of Eli!" Gabrielle stooped and started to clean up the mess.
"Here, let me help you." A moment later, the knee of a long leg bent and Xena came to the bard's aid.
They worked in partnership for a few minutes, foreheads almost touching, quietly scooping up all the bits and pieces of the broken bread from the floor.
Gabrielle reached out to grab up a chunk, and when Xena's hand stretched out for the same small bit, their fingers touched. The bard lifted her head and smiled, and found herself staring into a pair of sparkling blue eyes. For a few moments, both women forget what it felt like to breathe.
Instead of picking up the crumb, Xena found her fingers wrapping around a small hand and pulling Gabrielle toward her. They stood and Xena's arms moved of their own accord, enfolding a trim waist and bringing the delicious body against her own. She closed her eyes and sighed when she felt Gabrielle slide her hands up along the bare skin of her arms and slip to the back of her neck. Without protest, the warrior surrendered to the gentle pressure that pulled her head down and brought their lips together.
Xena drank in the taste of Gabrielle with a thirst that left her breathless. Groaning, she tightened her arms and pulled Gabrielle into her, deepening their kiss. Her lips and tongue feasted on the sweetest honey she had ever savored and Gabrielle's accompanying moan was music to her ears. But when voluptuous hips pressed in and began a sensuous dance against her groin, the strong warrior's legs gave out.
Still embraced in a kiss honeyed by oblivion, they stumbled backward. Xena's back slammed against the stove and a large pot teetered over and fell. Its contents of mystery stew spilled across the floor of the kitchen and sent the resident alley-cat scurrying for cover. Xena, unwilling to release her prize, rolled them away from the heat of the oven along the edge of the countertop, scattering a variety of dishes and silverwear in their wake. The roll ended at the storage bin with Xena on top of Gabrielle. Lips never leaving Gabrielle's, she gyrated her own sensual dance against a willing bard who was more than happy to continue the battle.
Gabrielle entwined her fingers in Xena's long, black locks and tugged hard, sucking in Xena's bottom lip for a sweet, delicious bite. The warrior cried out, but Gabrielle swallowed that, too.
Xena's legs wavered and they rolled along the counter again, following the same path and knocking over the rest of the pots, pans, and plates that hadn't been cleared away by the first pass. Oblivious to the kitchenware crashing around them, they rolled one over the other, coming to a top just before the stove. With a thud, Gabrielle landed conveniently on top of Xena. Xena's tongue ran along the inside of Gabrielle's upper lip and then dipped for another deep taste of sweet honey. Groaning, she felt Gabrielle using the opportunity to grind into her, intending to convey a very important message.
Bed ... now. Xena got the hint. She stood, enfolding her precious package in an embrace meant to carry them both away.
Gabrielle helped by lifting her legs and wrapping them around her warrior's waist, all the while thoroughly enjoying the caress of a supple tongue against her own. She smiled and continued to kiss Xena, content to let her partner carry her wherever she had in mind.
With lips still locked, Xena lumbered across the room kicking sundry pots and pans out of her way in an effort to clear a path. They staggered into a table, sending it crashing to the floor along with its compliment of knives and chopping utensils. Xena stepped back, adjusted her direction slightly, and pressed onward. A booted foot knocked into a bowl of milk, sending it skidding across the floor -- its owner howled in protest and scurried away, drenched and insulted.
The warrior slipped slightly on the spilled milk and thumped into a pile of flour sacks, knocking a few over. The sacks ripped open upon contact, and the white meal mixed nicely with the milk, coagulating instantly. Undaunted, Xena adjusted their course, still kissing her bard, and stomped through the muck.
As tongues swirled, arms weakened and Gabrielle began to slip down the length of her body. Xena hefted her up for a better grip. Strong hands slipped under luscious buttocks and Xena was treated to the feel of skin as Gabrielle's short skirt moved out of the way. But when long fingers brushed across warm wetness, the warrior moaned in ecstasy and her knees gave way once more.
They fell forward into a stack of ale barrels, sending a few rolling across the floor. Gabrielle absorbed the impact with a soft groan as her back hit a keg and Xena landed between her legs. They kissed and kissed, lips pressing, teeth nipping, hands caressing as Xena used the leverage of the barrel to sensuously grind into Gabrielle.
The barrel of ale rocked back and forth, eventually knocking a steady rhythm against the kitchen wall. The speed increased until finally the keg stopper popped and shot a stream of ale out across the room. It mixed with the milk and suddenly the cat was a little happier as it lapped it up.
As the barrel emptied, the stream of ale became a dribble and the rocking slowed. Caresses gentled and kisses turned tender. Smiling, Xena nibbled on Gabrielle's lips lovingly and ran her fingers through sun-blessed hair. Reluctantly, she withdrew, running her tongue along the inside of a lip fat with passion, and gave it once last nip for good measure. She leaned her ahead into Gabrielle's neck and nuzzled the soft, warm skin with a contented sigh.
The sweet enrapture was disrupted by loud crash. Both heads turned at the sound of the last remaining plate tipping off the counter and shattering on the floor.
Gabrielle smiled and brought Xena's attention back to her by running her hands along the length of her warrior's sable hair.
"Xena," she whispered softly in her partner's ear.
"Hmmm," the warrior replied contentedly.
"Does this mean you'll come to Athens with me?"
Xena nibbled on a little helping of skin. "Hmm Hmmm."
Gabrielle pouted. "Now, don't just say you'll come because I've put you in a compromising position."
"Compromising position? What compromising position? You think the position you have me in is a compromise?" Xena asked with a glint in her eye and promptly proceeded to plant her mark on Gabrielle's neck, right where everyone could see it.
The bard moaned with delight as Xena feasted the tender skin at the base her neck.
Gabrielle wiggled her neck free and forced Xena to look at her. "You know what I mean. I want you to go to Athens with me because you want to, not because you feel you have to."
Xena lifted her head and looked into the serious and concerned green eyes of the only person who had ever truly loved her. Smiling softly, she placed her lips so close to Gabrielle's that they shared the same air.
"I want to, Gabrielle, believe me, it's what I want, too." That said, Xena leaned in wanting only to just kiss the girl.
A gentle push of hands against her shoulder stopped her.
"Now is not the time to say things you don't mean, Xena," Gabrielle stated, all playfulness gone from her expression.
Xena's clear eyes traveled across the treasured features. Gods, how she adored this woman. "You are the only one I've ever wanted, and the only one I ever will. I promise, Gabrielle."
"You promise?" A blond eyebrow lifted. "What happened to no promises, Xena?"
"What can I do, Gabrielle?" Xena's blue eyes sparkled. "This thing we have, it's bigger than the both of us."
Ignoring the playful slap, this time Xena did lean in and just kiss the girl.
She wrapped her arms around Gabrielle and stood, lifting them both up off the floor, ready to have one more go at getting them out of there.
Toris walked into the kitchen with an armful of dirty dishes and almost dropped them all to the floor.
Not that it would have mattered.
"What the ...? Xena, what happened in here?" He walked in, stepping carefully over a big glob of flour soaking in a pool of ale-laced milk. Scooting a wobbly-legged cat away, he glanced around the disaster that was once his kitchen.
"Xena ... Gabrielle ... are you all right in here?" He called out, fearing another djinn-attack.
He searched for his sister, and just caught a glimpse of legs wrapped around a strong back as they disappeared up the stairs.
"Well, I guess that answers that question," Toris commented as he bent to begin to clean up.
Xena negotiated the tight corner at the stop of the stairwell and Gabrielle stopped kissing her long enough to appreciate the fact that they had made it all the way up.
"Where are you going to attempt to take me now?" Gabrielle asked, smiling.
"Not attempt ... succeed. I'm going to succeed at taking you to bed." Xena took long steps in the direction of the back bedroom.
"Bed? Now? Xena, its the middle of the afternoon. I thought we were going to go warn Mikos the farmer about that statue."
"Tomorrow," she mumbled as she began to kiss those delicious bard lips again, "we'll warn him tomorrow."
A booted foot kicked open the bedroom door, and strong legs carried them both inside.
*******
Mikos put the last of their belongings into the cart and cinched the load down. "That's it, Uliss. That's the last of it."
"Wait, one more thing!" Uliss ran up and stuffed an old quilt into a corner. "Can't leave that behind." She stood on tiptoes and gave her husband a quick kiss. "I'm so glad you finally decided to leave this farm."
"No use tryin' to squeeze water from a stone," Mikos replied. "I don't want any more of my family wasting their life on dead soil."
Uliss squeezed her husband's arm and smiled. She had been waiting for this moment for years. "Ready to go?" she asked, excitedly.
Mikos chewed his lip and looked at the sun. "Took us all day to pack. I don't want to be on the road when its dark. Whadda ya say we leave tomorrow, first light? One more night won't kill us, eh?"
Uliss wanted to object; she couldn't get off this farm fast enough. "Sure, darling, whatever you want."
"Najara!" Mikos, called out.
From inside the house, a mature Najara stepped out to answer her brother. "Yes, Mikos?"
"We'll be leaving tomorrow at first light. All right with you?"
"Fine with me," Najara replied, smiling. It was about time they were leaving this place, and they should have done it long ago. Najara vaguely remembered a time when she had briefly thought about leaving and going off on her own, but her brother was a good man and had needed her help here on their family's land. Though she had wanted to leave, her sense of loyalty to family had made her stay.
She turned her head and looked out across the field, over the barren acre to the end of the farmland, where the pasture met the road and an odd, ancient statue stood in the fading sunlight of late afternoon. It would give her a chance to talk to the Djinn one last time. He had spoken to her again, trying to get her to leave her brother and fight for the light.
Now that the farm was not an issue, maybe tomorrow would be a good day to do just that.
The End