Deus Ex Gabrielle

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Autolycus leaned back against a fallen log and stared with disgust at the plate of "food" the trio had offered him. Not that he wasn't grateful for the hospitality, mind you, but... if he'd known the meals would be like this, he would have asked Gabrielle to wait to transport him until after he'd eaten.

Come to think of it, he mused, this must be how Gabrielle stays so thin despite eating so much everytime I see her... she must just be making up for the lack of real food while she's on the road. He chuckled briefly.

Six irritated eyes immediately stared at him. "Oh, it was nothing. I was just thinking that food like this..." He trailed off as he noticed the eyes narrowing dangerously. Autolycus abruptly felt the need to loosen his collar - which was quite a feat considering his tunic didn't even have a collar. "...was just what I needed to perk me up and get me ready for the day!" he hurried to finish.

The three turned away - slightly mollified, if still distrustful - and the master thief breathed a huge sigh of relief. Setting aside his barely touched meal, he thought, Touchy, touchy. At least the berries are edible. Whatever they've done to the meat though, whew... and where'd they get it, anyway? Wrestled it away from a vulture?

"So," he began, "someone want to tell me how our little Gabrielle became a god?"

Iolaus looked uncertainly at Hercules and Xena, and when they showed no sign of answering, sighed and prepared to tell the story. Huh, he thought. Maybe there's something to Gabrielle's claim that sidekicks have to be storytellers after all... "Well, it was sort of an accident," he explained to Autolycus.

Xena, uninterested in hearing the story again and consequently revisiting the wrenching emotions it inspired, rose and dusted off her leathers. She had not slept well the night before, having tossed and turned almost until dawn. For once, though, it wasn't her usual batch of nightmares haunting her sleep; instead she had been haunted by the thought of losing Gabrielle - again.

She had faced that terrifying prospect many times - to the Athens Academy, to Perdicas, to the Amazons, to Dahak, to death - even to her own rage - but somehow this time seemed so... This time, she wasn't even sure if she had the right to want to keep her by her side.

Gods, she cursed morosely to herself. Sometimes it was hard enough to convince herself that Gabrielle was better off travelling with her - dealing as they did on a daily basis with bandits, warlords, thugs, scanty bad rations, and having in general just an uncomfortable and hard existence living out of a pair of small saddlebags - instead of leading a more comfortable, settled life - whether it be with the Amazons or back in Potadaiea. But now, with Gabrielle turned into a goddess... Could she honestly think her friend would be better off living hand to mouth with an aging ex-warlord than staying on Mount Olympus? Or was she simply so self-absorbed that she was unable to view the situation dispassionately?

Admittedly her own experiences with the gods had not been the best; and, after those encounters, she was simply too used to dealing with them on a personal level - and seeing them get themselves into all kinds of trouble - to offer the sort of blind obedience and faith in their power and rectitude that the gods demanded from their worshippers. Gabrielle on the other hand, while she had picked up a little of her attitude, had somehow managed to maintain her core of faith despite being exposed to the gods at their worst. She'd continued to pray to Artemis, still made offerings at her temples, and picked flowers to offer at roadside shrines... even though she knew the gods mostly didn't care and weren't even worthy of those simple offerings. It still amazed her how her friend had been able to maintain that faith under such adversity.

Xena herself had given up on the gods long ago... immediately after Lyceus' death at the hands of Cortese's army, in fact. She'd thought the gods were uncaring and nonexistent... well, she'd been half right anyway. Despite her lack of faith, or maybe because of it, Ares had managed to sink his talons deep into her uncaring soul. He hadn't removed them - or she hadn't managed to evict him - until Darphus had made her run the gauntlet. The frightening thing was... sometimes, even after all her work at reforming herself, she thought he still had a hold of some sort on her. There were times when the evil god just made so much sense... It was not a comforting thought. Still, that was something for later consideration.

Who was it who had said "familiarity breeds contempt?" That was just a little too extreme and pat a statement to explain her feelings about the gods - except maybe in Ares' case; anymore, she simply didn't really care if the gods existed or not. In fact she'd prefer to ignore them, and would greatly prefer that they return her the same favor. Unfortunately, considering Ares' obsession with her, and the gods' penchant for getting into trouble, that scenario wasn't very likely - especially since the ones who suffered the most from the gods' machinations were not the gods themselves.

And Gabrielle... She'd talked with Hercules about the problems and temptations Gabrielle was facing now that she was a goddess - the little that he could actually describe such extramortal experiences in purely mortal terms, that is; the conversation had seemed weirdly appropriate and proper as they'd sat together on the altar in the gutted shell of the temple of Ares she'd desecrated. His explanation for the changes a mortal - or even a demigod - went through upon being transformed into a full god was not comforting in the least, and the idea that she might have to face even more changes soon was worrisome in the extreme.

She'd seen mortals turned into gods before; Dagnine - into a god of sorts thanks to the Ixion stone - and Velaska and Callisto thanks to ambrosia, and none of them had been improved by the experience. For that matter, she'd also encountered several gods after they'd been turned mortal for one reason or another, and Hercules and Gabrielle had told her of still other examples when it had happened. Almost uniformly, they were better people for the lack of godhood; once they'd sobered up, anyway - the first reaction they had in almost every case was to get gloriously drunk.

Gabrielle on the other hand, was different. Simply put, she was a wonderful person : loving, kind, caring, and full of all the noble traits humans should aspire to... but she was still human, with all the hidden darkness buried inside that being human entailed, with the same foibles, anger, desire, and pain that lay hidden in every human soul. It had taken Xena a long time to realize that fact, and their relationship had taken some painful blows - mostly inflicted on Gabrielle. She had even thought her friend's understandable normal human reactions - maybe wrong, but very much stemming from Gabrielle's nature - to events were really betrayals - until she'd been forced - fighting against her own desires to pretend otherwise - to recognize the fact that she wasn't perfect.

Could someone - even someone as good at heart as Gabrielle - ever be unchanged by becoming a goddess? Her heart insisted Gabrielle would be able to overcome anything and everything and remain the same loving soul, but her mind stubbornly persisted in believing otherwise.

A moment's bleak humor made her chuckle bitterly. At least if Gabrielle is a goddess, there will actually be a god who is worthy of worship. Unfortunately, her momentary amusement didn't last long. It quickly faded under the weight of her worsening mood.

If Gabrielle remained a goddess... What will I do, the next time Ares provokes me? she wondered. When my blood boils in sympathetic resonance with his knowing words and the seductive simplicity of his vision of glory and triumph and death? When my frustrations and anger are boiling hot and fearsome, and my blood sings with the anticipation of slaughtering all who oppose me? "Kill 'em all" may have been a philosophy that worked just fine when she was running an army of cutthroats, but it wouldn't do much to guide her on her quest to redeem herself. Without Gabrielle by her side to help her focus on her own redemption - or hit her with a pitchfork when she started to slip - what would she do?

Torn between what her heart and her mind wanted to believe, and her desire to do what was right for herself and her friend, Xena could only pace restlessly, unable to relax. Her mind worked furiously, unable to come to any firm conclusions, but still wondering almost fearfully about the future, and worrying about her friend as she anxiously awaited word. She was fearful of losing Gabrielle, but unable to convince herself that losing her to be a god wasn't the better choice for Gabrielle - no matter how much it hurt her personally.

Across the clearing, a silent brooding figure watched Xena pacing with a slight frown. Hercules knew her unspoken fears and uncertainty quite well. He had faced them before himself, after the death of Iolaus at the hands of one of Hera's enforcers. It was a death that they were truly confronting in this case, after all... only of Gabrielle's soul, not her body.

Xena was worried, the demigod knew. Even though she had her impassive "warrior mask" on, the one that she hid her true thoughts and emotions behind, he could tell. Those small creases around her eyes and the slightly furrowed brow spoke louder than words to those who knew her well. They told him exactly how worried she was. Not that he blamed her.

Gabrielle was facing incredible temptations - and if the scant information they'd received were true, was actually successfully resisting them... but that might not last for long. He knew exactly what a trial being a god and maintaining a human standard of morality was. He couldn't begin to describe the incredible rush of power, strength, and... the sheer ecstasy that had washed over him upon becoming a god. It had been almost frightening how free it made him feel.

He still remembered those days perfectly. He doubted he'd ever be able to forget.

The first time he'd become a god, he'd been a mere callow youth, proud, arrogant, and overly full of himself, his puffed up ego stroked to full erection by Apollo's knowing and mocking taunts... and he'd been too stupid and ignorant to recognize the danger that such limitless power posed - both to himself and to others. It had taken the positive examples of Jason and Iolaus, and the negative example of the carefree and careless Apollo to remind him of what an ass he was being. In the end, he'd gladly given it up, but even so... a tiny fragment of his soul that he couldn't quite expunge had still longed for the return of that sensation, that rush of omnipotence...

Alcmene had always believed in Zeus' wisdom, even in the face of his deception and (to put it bluntly, despite her attempt to spin it as a seduction) rape of her, while cloaked in the guise of her dead husband. Even with his own turbulent relationship with his father, and their now... almost reconciliation, that betrayal of his mother - though it had resulted in his birth - was something he didn't think he could ever forgive - even if Alcmene had forgiven Zeus before he was even born. But was Zeus right in this case? Could Gabrielle handle being a god? Was there some noble purpose served by forcing her to endure that... terrible pleasure?

The second time he'd become a god had been radically different from the first...at least in the beginning. He'd thought he'd be better able to handle the changes. After all, he'd been older, wiser... and almost lost in grieving for his mother. He'd accepted Zeus' offer - mostly to honor Alcmene's dying request - but that small, hidden, mostly buried part of himself that he loathed and feared with equal weight had celebrated at getting that feeling of power back, the joy of omnipotence and freedom from mortal cares and worries. His sorrow for his mother's death had been all but washed away by the flood of power rushing through him.

After being forced to confront and defeat Hera, though... He'd soured on the whole tawdry affair. After assuming his father wanted to get to know him, to finally be a father... he'd had his hopes dashed... again. He'd been glad to give godhood up a second time; the taste of power was bitter on his tongue in the face of his father's machinations and schemes - the same schemes that he'd loathed in his father since he was old enough to recognize them for what they were.

He knew his father was surprised when he'd chosen to give it up again. The brief touch of the power after all the years without... it had been just another calculated seduction by Zeus, pure and simple. Something Zeus has a lot of practice at, Hercules thought with a great deal of irritation.

Even with the unethical and underhanded recruiting techniques Zeus had employed, Hercules had considered remaining a god. If he could prevent the other gods from messing with mortals... but even then he'd been aware of the price required to keep that terrible power. In the end, he'd chosen to return to mortality. He might not be able to do as much... but he'd be assured that he'd actually want to continue to protect mankind. Only when his grief for his mother had reasserted itself - once the godhood had been pulled from his body - had he known for sure that he had done the right thing. So why had it been so very hard to do it?

Iolaus and Gabrielle, and even Xena, who of all people should have known better, had this idea that he was all good; the perfect man. Even if to no one else, the memory of the Sovereign showed him just how wrong they were. Though he hid it well, because of his shame at his own weakness, and his desire to be the hero everyone thought him to be, he was not perfect. Indeed, he was far from perfect.

He had an ego. He felt pride. By Zeus, he loved being the strongest man alive. He loved having women throw themselves on him when he strode back into town, flushed with victory after successfully slaying yet another ferocious monster. He loved the way Iolaus followed him - neglecting even his aging mother to continue on the travels and adventures with him. He loved the way people stared in awe as he passed. He loved the way tales of his triumphs were told and retold even further away than his own journeys had ever taken him... And he hated himself when he felt that way. With all his heart he wished he were that perfect soul Gabrielle and the others thought him to be.

What had been most frightening about meeting the Sovereign had not been the differences between them, but how close they truly were. No one - not even Iolaus - knew of the internal struggles he had waged within himself, keeping down his own demons and his own towering pride.

Alcmene's moral guidelines, his loving upbringing and the friendships he enjoyed with many good people made those struggles far, far easier to face for him then they had apparently been for his shadow "brother," but they were never over... and indeed would never be. Human darkness, melded with divine power... equalled the Sovereign. And the chance for him to sink to that level would always remain with him. There but for the grace of the Fates...

Perhaps that was why he'd tried so hard to reform Xena all those years ago. Looking at the way she'd been then, with the advantage of hindsight, he could clearly see in her the darker reflection of how he viewed himself. Where he'd always kept his darkness down, she'd wallowed in it, lived for it. And if she - a vicious, sadistic, purely human warlord - could overcome the evil within her soul, despite years of allowing it to control her, surely he - a son of Zeus and more importantly Alcmene - could do the same? He frowned at the thought. Surely my motivations were purer than that... I loved her! He shelved that uncomfortable thought for later consideration. He didn't like the implications of that idea at all.

It was with a great deal of relief that his thoughts changed to a gentler topic. As often happened when he considered his moral makeup, his thoughts returned to his wife. He had truly loved Deineira. She had been a loving, caring soul who had been his true emotional and moral center, through good times and bad, through his long journeys far from home having adventures and performing labors, and even through the pain he'd caused with the occasional extramarital dalliances - with women both mortal and divine - he couldn't quite stop himself from indulging in.

In the Elysian Fields after her death her essential purity and devotion to him had still remained unsullied - even when severely tested with Ares' gleeful intervention and later by his own growing love for Serena. And even though no one else remembered his wedding to the last Golden Hind, or her reactions, thanks to the power of the Chronostone and an altered timeline, he still remembered... and mourned for what might have been.

He frowned as he grew more somber. Hades, I'm depressing himself. He'd loved - really loved, not some meaningless purely physical encounter - only four times in his life. Of those loves, one was dead, one never even knew they'd been married, one was now mortal and raising Ares' child - though his love for Nemesis had never been as deep as the others, and the fourth had moved on in her life. Xena had once said, during his bout of depression after Serena's death, that their time together was past, and intellectually he knew that to be true, but even still... Somehow he couldn't quite let her entirely out of his heart. It still hurt to see her in such pain, but he well knew any attempt he made to comfort her would be sharply rebuffed. All he could do was watch, and... everything in his power to ensure that Gabrielle was safely returned to her.

Gabrielle... She'd been so young when they first met, eagerly questioning him about his labors. So innocent and pure... and although he hadn't recognized it at the time, so like Deineira. Gabrielle was no longer so young, or nearly so innocent - years on the road with Xena would do that - but her essential core of goodness and hope and faith still remained, despite everything she'd been through, and all the pain and suffering she'd endured. She'd been tempered like a good blade, and her spirit was the stronger for it.

Deineira... Sometimes when Gabrielle spoke, it was almost as though Deineira was speaking. They looked nothing alike, and would have likely fiercely disagreed on any number of things - Deineira had been much less trusting of people for one thing - but... The purity of their souls, and that core of goodness in their beliefs was striking in their similarity. Xena was drawn to that purity like a moth to a flame, much as he had been all those years ago.

And Gabrielle, although she undoubtedly tried to hide it, was drawn to Xena in turn. Her eyes shone with the strength of her emotions when speaking of, or even simply looking at Xena. He recognized the strength of the bond between them even if they didn't; his own bond with Deineira had been so very similar.

He missed that connection with his wife horribly. She'd been the rock he relied on when trudging through some stinking swamp in Asia Minor looking for a hydra; the strength and support he'd drawn on to give him the will necessary to come home through all the bandit-ridden leagues in between; the close confidant he'd needed to soothe his worries and anxieties; she'd been the only one to whom he could confess his self-doubts and his fears and his own failings - she'd listened to him, and understood him... and forgave him for what they drove him to do.

Although intellectually he knew she wasn't really gone, just waiting for him in the Elysian Fields, there was still an intensely emotional sense of loss, of being disconnected and adrift. Iolaus, Jason, Salmoneus, and his other friends helped, but sometimes... sometimes he just felt so alone. That was the opposite side of the coin... and one of the ways he was able to keep his ego and pride under control. He was always different, always... apart.

When Nemesis had shown him Evander, and told him he was the father, he'd felt renewed, like a new man. He'd felt so connected... Like he was once more tied into humanity, rather than forever set apart because of his father... like the perfect little child he held in his arms was his renewal... the embodiment of his hope. When he'd discovered the truth, it had been like he'd been stabbed in the heart.

That helped him firm his resolve. He would do whatever it took to keep that bond from being broken. He couldn't stand to see Xena suffer the pain that was left in the ashes of its destruction - both for her sake, and - if what Iolaus had told him about a possible future was true - the world's.

Autolycus turned to Iolaus as they watched Xena and Hercules pace and think, their expressions a toss-up as to which was the grimmest and most depressed. "What's wrong with them? You'd think they'd be happy Gabrielle was a goddess."

"It's not that easy," Iolaus sighed. "Being a god changes you - Herc knows that better than anyone. And Xena... well, I don't know how she'd be able to deal with being without Gabrielle again. They've been through so much together, and they care so much for each other."

"You don't need to tell me that - I had Xena inside me once, and while she was there she just happened to kiss Gabrielle - whew!" he breathed with the intensity of the memory of that moment. He looked briefly indignant. "And no matter what blondie says, remember - it was Xena that put the hand on her butt, not me."

The hunter stared at the thief as strange mental images crossed his mind. "Don't you mean that first part the other way around?" Her inside him?

"Ha ha. Laugh it up, funny boy. You should get a job at the Comedy Cave. Besides, you're just jealous... pipsqueak."

Sighing, Iolaus didn't rise to the bait. The mood was just too melancholy to deal with at the moment. After a time, Iolaus said, "You know, somehow it's just not as much fun arguing with you as it used to be. Either I'm more worried about Gabrielle than I thought, or I'm getting old."

Autolycus sat down next to him again and awkwardly patted him on the shoulder in a unfamiliar gesture of understanding and camaraderie. "I know exactly what you mean, old man. Though personally, I think you're just getting old and slow." When the shorter man didn't respond to those verbal sallies either, the thief relented.

Sighing heavily, he offered a solution. "Tell you what... once this is all over, lets all head over to this little bar I know... lovely woman runs it, looks suspiciously like a certain warrior princess we both know - but is much more accommodating. We'll have a few drinks... tell a few stories... lie about our incredible adventures... pick up a few girls... it'll cure what ails us."

"Sounds like fun," Iolaus responded glumly, though it was plain his heart wasn't in it. Now I know I'm getting old. If I can't muster more enthusiasm than that for a good old-fashioned tavern crawl...

The king of thieves shrugged. He'd tried...he wasn't much for all this touchy-feely brotherly friendship crap anyway. His attention was abruptly drawn across the campsite. "Now what's wrong with her?" Autolycus suddenly asked, his brow furrowing as he stared curiously at Xena.

Across the camp, the Warrior Princess had abruptly spun in place and put one hand on the hilt of her sword. Staring daggers into an empty space across the clearing from her, she was clearly ready for action.

"I don't know," the hunter began slowly, "but..." A flash of green light interrupted him. Gabrielle appeared, covered by an enveloping white cloak and facing away from the campfire. Xena had been looking precisely at the spot in which she'd appeared.

Iolaus turned to Hercules as he approached and asked the demigod in wonderment, "How does she do that?"

Herc could only shrug. He could never figure out how she did it either.

Xena slowly walked forward, even as the afterimage of Gabrielle's teleport faded from sight. "Gabrielle?" she asked softly, hesitantly. She continued to slowly approach her, even as the goddess spun about to face her friend. Xena's eyes widened in shock.

Her surprise was shared by Iolaus. The other two, having already seen her after her transformation, were a little better prepared for the impact of her divinity, though Hercules did raise an eyebrow at the sight of the new armor and weapons. No matter how aware they were of the existence of those changes however, all were affected by her divine presence.

Xena at least, should have expected it. After Callisto had eaten ambrosia the jagged scar that ran across the length of her face had melted away as though it had never been there. But Gabrielle...

Gabrielle was beautiful. She had been before of course, but with the addition of godhood, she practically glowed with a supernaturally healthy vitality. Her skin was pale and flawless, almost luminous in the light, and her hair shone like molten gold under the warm glow of the sun. Her cloak had fallen open during her confrontation with Nebula, and the scant armor enhanced more than concealed her attributes while framing her tight abdomen to perfection.

She had been mostly covered by her cloak while in a dark inn bedroom when Autolycus had seen her, and Hercules had been half asleep and seeing her by the dim light of a sorcerous orb. Now, in the sunlight and wide awake they were struck by the full effect. They were awestruck, and could only stare at the sight of her. Iolaus' eyes practically popped out of their sockets as he stared at the vision of loveliness and purity before him, while the other two, even though partially prepared, were likewise struck mute. Each of the men - even Hercules, who'd dealt with the gods more often and should have been used to the sight of divinely comely females (though since Gabrielle was new, she hadn't learned how to tone it down yet, or even learned the need to do so) - shifted uncomfortably on their feet, affected by her more than they were willing to admit, even to themselves.

Xena didn't even notice their stiff reactions. She was too busy simply staring at her transformed friend. Her eyes locked firmly onto the worried features on Gabrielle's downcast face. Ever so slowly, she walked over to the vision of pulchritude standing before her. Her face was the same, but... oh, so different.

Her features were perfect in the way only a goddess' could be, with the small imperfections - the lines and marks of age, and of the rigors of ordinary human existence - washed away and replaced with sheer ethereal beauty. With one trembling hand she lifted the lowered chin of the goddess standing pale and uncertain before her, and stared into the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. They were unchanged; they remained Gabrielle's. Her fears and uncertainty seemed to melt away as she gladly sank into the warm embrace of those verdant pools. "Gabrielle...?" she asked gently, but hesitantly, a clear invitation hanging in her warm tones.

Tears welled up in those beautiful orbs as she realized her dearest friend wasn't going to reject her, and with a cry of "Oh, Xena!" the goddess hugged her fiercely. Those pale arms wrapped tightly around her waist, drawing the warrior close to her, while she buried her face against the cold metal plate of her shoulder armor, crying great tears of mixed joy, sadness, worry, and relief at being back with her friend, despite the present difficulties.

Xena's own eyes were suspiciously damp and reflective as she held her sobbing friend close. Gabrielle had changed... that was undeniable, but as she held her nestled securely in her arms, she knew with a bone-deep certainty that she still held the same person she'd known for so long... the same woman she loved. Burying her face in the golden hair, she breathed deeply, smelling the familiar scent and savoring the comfortable warmth she exuded from every pore. Even more than when she stood in her old room at Cyrene's inn, she felt... at home and at peace.

The three watching men, still shifting uncomfortably from the direct exposure to the divine Gabrielle, felt the reflected warmth of the two women's reunion. Despite themselves, they could not help but feel a little lost and excluded as they felt the strength of the love shared between the two. They were so deeply involved in each other at that moment, that it was as though the others (and the rest of the world) had ceased to exist.

Watching the reunion was painful for the men. Each of the three had continued to nurture small hopes and dreams - no matter how impossible they felt them to be - of someday possibly forming a more permanent personal relationship with one or the other (or both). In the face of the obvious love shining between the two women, they were forced to confront the bitter truth that those dreams were simply not to be.

Unseen by the mortals, Aphrodite turned away from her scrying pool and high-fived Cupid with a delighted laugh. The moment was absolutely perfect. Years of effort had finally paid off, and the Goddess of Love was groovin' to the awesome vibes the pair were emitting. Even if Gabrielle takes up with Arty, rather than join me doing the love thing, I'll still have gotten this perfect moment out of those two... Am I good, or what?

The pair held their pose for long minutes, uncaring of their watchers as they gradually adjusted to the changes in their relationship, and the changes in Gabrielle. When they finally released their embrace, Gabrielle laughed a little shakily and wiped her leaking eyes on the back of one hand. "This wasn't quite how I pictured our reunion," she said unsteadily.

"It doesn't matter," Xena said calmly, holding her firmly by the shoulders and gripping tightly, never wanting to let go. "We're together again, and that's all that counts."

Finally deciding the moment was innocent and innocuous enough for him to interrupt, Hercules cleared his throat briefly, then asked gently, "Gabrielle? What happened at the meeting? We got your note, but then Autolycus told us you said the gods wouldn't help you..."

"And what was that about Ares getting you 'stuck?'" Iolaus added, edging closer, but still standing a little funny.

Gabrielle laughed a little, the familiar voices and friendly faces around her making her feel better than all the gilded and shining beauty of Mount Olympus ever had. A small, content voice in her head reassured her : she was home. At the same time, she was relieved that she was getting better at shielding herself from reading unwanted thoughts... from the way the men were standing, the situation likely would be more embarrassing for her then her talk with Orion had been. "One at a time, one at a time," she jokingly soothed them. "A lot's happened, not all of it good, but I'll tell you everything."

She turned to Iolaus first, since his question was easiest to answer. "He trapped me in this armor," she explained, pushing back the cloak completely to reveal it in all its scanty glory. There was a collective intake of breath among the four seeing it, and Iolaus abruptly sat down, as much to hide his obvious physical reaction as from the shock.

"It...You...you look really good, Gabrielle," he said with a slight quaver in his suddenly high-pitched voice, unable to look away despite telling himself he was being rude for staring.

"Yes," Autolycus muttered slowly, stroking his mustache. "Gabrielle, I had no idea you'd grown so... muscular. Maybe I should have taken you up on your earlier offer." He hurriedly added, "I'm kidding, I'm kidding," when four angry pairs of eyes turned on him. "Sheesh, you people need to learn to take these things less seriously."

"Yeah, well..." Gabrielle started to retort, then changed her mind. He couldn't help it, and she knew full well that humor was his natural defense mechanism. He was probably just overwhelmed by the situation and trying to recover his balance. If only it wasn't so annoying...

"I really prefer my old clothes, but he charmed this armor so that I can't remove it. I mean, I can adjust it enough to," she blushed slightly, "you know, but I can't take it off - not even for a moment. It's irritating, but it could have been much worse. Anyway, I'm hoping once I go back to being a mortal, my clothes will shift back with me."

The three men nodded in understanding, having seen a similar effect once themselves. Although having their clothes return wasn't quite the same thing as having them change... and the effect of destroying Hephaestus' chains wasn't quite the same as removing a godhood... okay, so maybe it wasn't similar, but they understood it anyway.

"So what happened at the meeting, Gabrielle?" Xena asked impatiently, eager for more information. She put one hand under the cloak and rested it on her shorter companion's back. "I can tell you're still a goddess, but... what went wrong?"

A shiver ran up her spine at the warm touch of Xena's hand on her bare back. She'd loved it when her big friend slipped from behind her stoic facade long enough to share casual touches or brief moments of intimacy when she'd been mortal, but as a goddess the sensation was... intense. "Um," she stammered, distracted for a long moment, then with a visible effort, composed herself again.

She took a deep breath, and launched into her story, using her full bardic talent and began explaining everything that had happened, though without moving away from her position leaning against the solid warmth of Xena's muscular, leather-clad length. She told them everything; from Bacchus' offer, to Discord's payoff of the Muses, to the tie vote and the bickering among the gods that had made her flee in disgust - and her fate if she couldn't find a way to change herself back.

The four listeners were horrified and sympathetic, but Hercules was also downright embarrassed. "I'm sorry Gabrielle. My... relatives aren't always the nicest people. I know Aphrodite and Artemis are probably sorry they drove you off, though. They'll likely apologize the next time you see them."

"It's okay," she reassured him softly. "I was feeling pretty depressed about everything, but I watched the sunrise from the top of the Parthenon this morning, and it helped calm me down some. Besides, I think Athena gave me an idea about what to do."

"What idea?" the four spoke as though in one voice.

"Well," she explained, "as I was sitting there, I suddenly remembered - or rather, she made me realize, that there were other sources of power than the gods - or at least other sources not directly and absolutely controlled by the gods - so... maybe I don't need another god to fix this."

Seeing the looks of confusion, Gabrielle elaborated on her ideas; "First, I dropped by the Athens Academy to talk to Orion," seeing the blank looks on three of the faces, she explained, "he's a friend of mine at the Bard's Academy there. That's not his real name, but... anyway, he's going to look through the library at the academy and see if he can find out anything about how to remove a godhood. They have one of the largest collections of writings in existence, so if there's anything known to man about how to take away godhood, it should be in there.

"I just hope he finds something soon," she added after thinking a moment and checking the position of the sun to see how much time she had left, "since I'm running out of options and time."

Xena frowned as she contemplated the possibilities. It had been easy to forget the deadline looming on the horizon in the warmth of their reunion, but the sword of Damocles was still dangling precariously in its position just above Gabrielle's head. "How will you know if he finds something?"

Gabrielle smiled, and her face lit up momentarily. "I can check on him any time - since I know him so well. I don't even have to go back to Athens." Xena's reaction was visibly mixed at that revelation.

Thinking Xena didn't understand what she'd meant by that explanation, she decided to simply show her what she had meant. "Let's see," she began, and her eyes lost their focus on her immediate surroundings.

She slowly rotated until she was facing Athens and stared through the trees and a distant mountain as though they weren't even there. Her voice grew a little dreamy when she spoke, and sounded almost off-handed as she described what was going on in the Academy on the other side of Greece. "Right now Orion and Stallonus are talking in the library..." she moved her visual reference around slightly to get a better look at their location, "...in the classics section... they're... going over a scroll... and they're talking about... oh Gods, not that scroll," she broke off, looking embarrassed and disappointed as her expression fell.

"What?" more than one voice demanded, shocked at her abrupt shift in demeanor. "What scroll?" Iolaus wanted to know.

"Never mind," she blushed slightly. "Anyway," she began again, forcing a bright and open expression to reappear on her face, "after that, I went to Autolycus since he always seems to know a lot about mystical artifacts and sacred relics."

Autolycus sat up straight and prepared to bask in the glow of their admiration.

"The better to steal them," Iolaus muttered, deflating his bubble only slightly.

"Hey," he protested. "I don't always steal... besides, I helped her out - I've helped all of you out, at one time or another in point of fact, I might add. My whole life isn't dedicated to thieving, you know," he continued while sounding highly offended.

A brief moment of honesty forced him to add off-handedly, "Just most of it. And anyway, I get most of my information about artifacts like that from Nebula -"

"Nebula? Really? Why would a pirate need to know about stuff like that?" Iolaus wondered aloud, automatically thinking back to the circumstances of their last meeting, where she'd helped them rescue Hercules' brother King Iphicles from Ajax and a group of angry veterans of the Trojan War on Golgoth...when she'd taken that shower... He shook off his momentary reverie with an effort and looked over at the thief, waiting for his response.

"Search me," Autolycus replied, then stood up and backed away when Iolaus looked like he would like to - just on general principles. "After she lost her last ship and crew, she's been excessively worried about stuff like that. I don't have a clue as to why, though."

Iolaus and Hercules shared a look and said in unison, "Arachne."

Gabrielle shrugged, making a mental note to get the full story from them later (she may be a goddess at the moment, but she's still Gabrielle, after all), then continued, "Anyway, the only thing she could think of that might have helped were the scrolls of the titans by the temple of Kronos and even if they were the right spells - which they aren't - it wouldn't matter since I couldn't use them anymore." She abruptly looked a little flustered, like she wished she hadn't said that. There was just something about talking about sex that made her extremely nervous, and made her lose control of her tongue. She made another mental note : this time to stop talking about that particular subject. Though somehow she doubted she'd be able to keep that promise.

"Why not? Why can't you use them?" Autolycus asked curiously. Spells? Ones that really work? Maybe I could get them and use them, even if she can't...

With a half-smile, since he'd heard the story before, Iolaus leaned over and stage-whispered, "Because you have to be a virgin." The thief had the grace to look embarrassed. So much for that idea...

Blushing, Gabrielle pretended not to have heard Iolaus' teasing comment. "By the way... Autolycus? She says you still owe her 2000 dinars for Samothrace."

Iolaus snickered at the look on his face. "Not even any honor among thieves, eh Autolycus?"

Autolycus looked disgusted. "Keep it up, laughing boy. Before long Herc here'll have to get Salmoneus to find you a jester's costume. Then everyone will know what a funny guy you are - or at least what a fool." He was smugness personified as he waited for a reaction.

For some reason, Hercules almost fell over at that. Iolaus just looked furious beyond reason at the relatively mild comment.

Gabrielle took pity on them, and hurriedly interceded before the meaningless fight could progress further or get any worse. Remembering the pirate's other request, she said, "Oh, and Iolaus? She says she still looks forward to getting you into bondage."

Xena actually smiled at that, and Hercules looked like he was going to burst out laughing. At least he's shaken off his earlier funk, she mused. Autolycus and Iolaus traded identical embarrassed looks and silently agreed to call a truce. Their faces were blushing as rosily as the goddess'.

"Anyway, that's how things stand," Gabrielle concluded once the others had settled down again. "The gods won't help me, there's no artifact known that can help me, and unless I can figure out how to undo this before dawn tomorrow, I'll be stuck - permanently. I'll have to choose between service with Artemis or Aphrodite, and remain a goddess for the rest of eternity."

Xena looked impassive, but a small muscular tic in her jaw, and the vein throbbing visibly in her temple spoke of the iron control she was imposing on her emotions and expression. Hercules simply looked dismayed at the dismal prospects. "If Zeus has decreed that you are to remain a god, he must have a reason. I don't agree with much of what he's done during his reign, but he hasn't stayed king for so long by acting rashly - except when it comes to women," he reluctantly added. "But I don't think that's what he has in mind in this case."

"Maybe, but even knowing all that, it still doesn't help Gabrielle get back to normal," Iolaus protested.

Somehow, no one could find a good response to that. They sank into a depressed silence as each tried to think of a potential solution - with very little chance of success.

Gabrielle checked the sun again. It was already well past midday. Her allotted time was nearly half over, and she still had no clue how to proceed. The others looked blank, although Xena remained deep in thought as she continued to work on the problem and consider their options.

Sighing in frustration, she decided to check in again on the bards. Maybe they'd have finished talking about that damn scroll by now. Her little story - and Artemis' revenge - seemed to be doing her almost as much harm as Ares.

To her surprise, Orion and Stallonus weren't in the library anymore - in fact no one was. It took a great deal of effort to actually find any of them; every single person at the Academy was concentrating so fiercely on their labors as to make the leakage of their thoughts - which she ordinarily would have used to find them - almost negligible.

She was surprised and pleased to find them all working so hard. Orion must have told them of my problem, and convinced them to help me. Maybe my situation wasn't hopeless after all. She looked a little deeper into Orion's mind to see if they had made any progress. "'What rhymes with "hen?"'" she unconsciously echoed incredulously as she read what he was concentrating so fiercely on.

Xena and the others stared at her as she spoke that incomprehensible sentence aloud. Shocked, Gabrielle shifted her attention to Stallonus. "'Which better serves to dramatically represent the movement of a chicken - Attic or Dorian rhythms?'" he thought, much to her horror and chagrin.

What on earth are they doing?

Vaguely, she heard another bard, one she didn't know, begin proudly reciting the beginning to his poem :

"Ares held his cock in hand
The chicken protesting his demand.
Discord clucking as she choked,
while the god slowly stroked."

Another voice disturbed her consciousness. "Discord's female - that should be 'hen,' not 'cock,'" the voice protested. "And what rhymes with 'rutabaga,' anyway?"

The crestfallen poet sighed, "Oh, yeah, I knew that," and went back to rework his poem.

Another voice cried out, "It's a joke, you dolt! 'Pullet' and 'Pull it,' are you too dense to recognize it?"

What is happening here? She ignored the cautious questions Xena and the others were increasingly frantically asking her as they observed her pale and frozen face as she focused more and more of her concentration on the bizarre happenings in the faraway city.

She checked every single person in the academy - even the teachers and janitors. Without exception, they were feverishly composing : stories, poems, lays, ballads, songs, and one old stablehand was even painting an exquisitely detailed picture on the wall of an empty stall. And, also without exception, the subject of their efforts was the newly distributed story she had written of Ares and his supposed bestial encounter with the transformed Discord.

Not one person has spent any time at all searching for a cure, she realized in horror. This is a nightmare. Gods, she thought, shaking her head. The Muses sure picked a bad time to inspire...

She froze as that thought crystallized like an icy dagger in her mind. The sneaking suspicion turned to a cold fury as the sudden realization struck her. "That... that... cheating... ooh!" she suddenly screamed. Iolaus, who had approached her after she failed to respond to repeated loud questions, leaped away in surprise as she suddenly moved and screeched loudly enough to shake the leaves on the surrounding trees. "Ares, you slimy weasel, if you thought the last scroll I wrote was bad, just you wait! When I get through with you, no one will ever respect you or want to follow you again! If you thought donkeys and chickens were bad, wait'll you see what's coming next!" she screeched furiously.

"What?" Xena demanded at her deafening outburst, drawing her sword and running over to her.

"Ares!" she burst out, thinking that explained it all. While it did, and Xena understood it at least in part, the others clearly needed more information. Abruptly remembering the four didn't know what was going on in Athens, she took a deep, calming breath before trying to talk again. Then, seeing the others were still impatiently waiting for an answer to Xena's question, she tried to explain her sudden burst of fury. "Ares paid off the Muses right? By sending Discord to pass those bribes, or whatever they were?"

"Sure sounded like it to me, from how you described it," Xena agreed, sheathing her sword as the situation seemed less immediately dire.

"The stupid bards in Athens are all too busy composing songs and stories about HIM right now to look for ways to help me." She didn't bother to explain that the stories weren't exactly favorable. It was still his slimy fingers behind the whole situation, and she wasn't in the mood to cut him any slack at all. "Ares must know I won't choose him, but he's making sure I get trapped into staying a god, regardless. He's punishing me for everything I've done to him."

Xena hugged her, offering mute comfort. Iolaus and Autolycus looked disgusted and dismayed, but Hercules simply looked furious.

"What am I going to do, Xena? What am I going to do?" Gabrielle moaned.

The warrior princess rocked her gently, soothing her like a child, and offering comfort as well as she could. She felt almost as trapped by the situation as Gabrielle. She'd like nothing better than a chance to thrash Ares for the mess he'd made of the situation - and emasculate Apollo for starting it as well - but knew wishing for the opportunity would serve little purpose. Crooning softly and reassuringly, she forced down the anger that was threatening to consume her, and tried to concentrate solely on simply comforting Gabrielle.

Feeling a little like voyeurs as they watched the two friends drawing comfort from each other in a tight embrace, the others soon looked away - helped along by Xena's fierce warning stare. Still whispering soft words of reassurance and love, Xena continued to glance up from the embrace periodically to check on the others - and to continue scanning the perimeter. Maybe she couldn't help Gabrielle with her main problem, but she'd be damned if some pissant dirtbag bandit interrupted her when she was giving the new goddess the small comfort she could offer her.

Forced to turn away by the heat of her warning glances, Autolycus and Iolaus soon sank into a deep mode of thought that was perilously close to a funk. Hercules, on the other hand, angry with the situation and his brother's manipulations, felt the need to be doing something... anything. Using his great strength, he started collecting the large fallen branches from some terrible past storm that had been simply too large for any of the others to move, and began shattering the thick tree limbs with single blows of his mighty fists. He gathered the pieces into a neat pile near the small campfire.

Gabrielle, once she had drawn sufficient warmth and reassurance from her friend to overcome her immediate crisis of confidence, although nothing but becoming a mortal again would wholly lift the dark mood that clouded her brow, tilted her head back to look up with gratitude at her friend. To her surprise, Xena seemed to be staring at something behind her, even as she continued to soothe the troubled goddess. Not wanting to leave her comfortable position in Xena's arms, she lifted her head slightly to look over one of Xena's armored shoulders, and tried to see what had captured Xena's attention. It was then she saw Hercules involved in his self-imposed labors.

For a moment, she just stared at him, amazed as always by his titanic strength as huge logs shattered with negligible effort under single, effortless blows of his fist, driven as they were by the strength of his mighty thews. An idea slowly began to form in her mind as she continued to stare unblinking at him as he worked. She watched him as though her life depended upon it, and in an odd way, it did.

He used his divine strength to gather firewood in mere moments that would have taken her and Xena hours - if not days - to collect and store even if working together, simply by destroying a large fallen log that had caught his attention. Something teased at her memory, and with a flash of delighted realization the idea appeared whole and complete before her mind's eye. Excited, she shouted out, "That's it!" with eyes wide with hope.

Everyone turned to look at the excited goddess. She slipped out of Xena's arms and ran to Hercules. "Hercules, you're a demigod, right?" she demanded breathlessly, gripping him so tightly near his elbows that it was painful even for him.

Staring at her like she'd gone insane, he said only, "Yes," before gently loosening her grip. That'll leave bruises, he winced.

"But you've been a god before - more than once even, and you told me you were simply mortal once before too; you know, without your strength."

Hercules nodded slowly, not seeing where she was going with her questions, and also slightly confused because she was remembering something that had only happened in the altered timeline - and consequently she should not have been able to remember. Maybe it's a god thing, he mused.

"Now, Zeus... pulled out your divinity, I think you said when you told me the story originally, and Ares did something similar when he took away your demigod-hood, right?"

"So?" he asked, still unenlightened.

Gabrielle on the other hand was too excited to remain still. Hercules had been on the receiving end of the procedure she needed to replicate - several times, and in several different ways - so he should be able to tell her whatever she needed to know to come up with a way to perform the technique. "Come over here," she commanded, then remembering herself, swiftly added, "please. Tell me everything...and I mean everything about it. How it felt, where it hurt, what they did... If I can recreate it, I might not need another god to be able to undo it." She dragged him to the other side of the clearing and began unleashing a barrage of questions, not even waiting for his acquiescence before starting her interrogation.

For the first time since Gabrielle had broken down in her storm of tears, Xena began to hope. Seeing the two talking - or rather Gabrielle unleashing a stream of questions and demands for greater detail, she turned to Iolaus and Autolycus, and gruffly ordered, "Get everything ready - I'm going to get us something for dinner." She stalked off into the woods, leaving the pair to look questioningly at each other.

"You'd think she'd be in a better mood," Autolycus complained, sitting down and pulling off a boot to shake out a stone that had felt like it was the size of a dinar - but was actually only about the size of his pinky fingernail, "since it looks like Gabrielle's going to be okay now."

"Yeah, well... these are the gods we're dealing with you know. Somehow I don't think it's going to be quite that easy. Anyway, she doesn't want to build up her hopes only to have them dashed."

Iolaus looked around the campsite. It was still in pretty good shape, but did need a little work thanks to Herc's demolition project. "Let's get everything ready before she gets back. We don't want her to be in a bad mood."

Autolycus heartily agreed with that sentiment. He looked over to where the other pair were closeted, heads close together as they spoke in rushed, chopped sentences. Gabrielle had one hand full of glowing white... something, while the other was carefully probing and feeling inside Herc's shirt, running across his bare chest. Shaking his head, he decided he didn't want to know.

Iolaus caught the direction of his gaze, and agreed with Autolycus' unspoken decision not to comment. Instead, he turned to the thief and asked, "So... do you know how to cook?"

Xena's passage was more silent than the whisper of the wind as she moved easily through the forest. She was one with the trees, passing with nary a flutter of the leaves, and the small birds and animals surrounding her failed to even take notice of her swift passage.

The hunt will be easy today, she noted absently, bending down to examine the fresh rabbit spoor by the edge of the path. She abruptly frowned at that observation.

Yesterday these woods had been all but picked clean, with no sign of any animal larger than a sparrow within ten minutes' radius from their camp. Today, barely out of sight of the fire, she'd already found several discrete tracks of rabbits and other small game animals. Something was definitely unusual. She bypassed the obvious tracks and continued on, searching for other game.

Deer, rabbits, boar... she soon crossed even fresher tracks from each animal as she followed a narrow game trail deeper into the woods. She began to get an inkling of what was happening when she sighted the huge, pure white stag drinking from a narrow stream in a clearing ahead.

"Don't bother, Artemis," Xena finally said, staring at the magnificent animal as it drank. "If you want to apologize, talk to her - not to me."

An arrow shot out of the undergrowth and slapped into the stag's side, sinking to the fletching in his flank and piercing both lungs. The animal coughed once, staining its muzzle with its lifeblood, then collapsed dead on the bank.

Artemis strode from the bushes, slinging her bow and drawing a small wickedly sharp blade as she approached the corpse of the stag. "What makes you think I'm trying to apologize?" she asked haughtily, keeping her back turned to the warrior.

Xena almost smiled at what, in a human, she would have been called sheer bravado. "And I suppose you send every hunter their choice of targets... within sighting distance of their camp?"

With a sigh, Artemis sank down by the stag and made sure he was dead. With practiced motions she began preparing the body for transport. Both the goddess and the warrior remained silent while she worked. When Artemis had finished with the messy task, she said, while still not looking at Xena, "Gabrielle is my chosen - and she rejects me." She risked a brief look at the warrior, and her face showed her distress clearly.

"You took her for granted... assumed you knew better than she did what she really wanted." The irony of the situation and her own words didn't escape her. She distrusted all of the gods, but Gabrielle did care for this one. Sighing, she decided to remain civil despite her personal feelings. "She still loves you - that hasn't changed, I don't think; she's just a little upset with you right now."

"I..." Artemis began, then stopped. "I honestly did what I thought was best for her," she explained rather defensively before turning back to the stag.

One corner of Xena's mouth perked up in a half-smile. Gabrielle's the one who does the sensitive chats... why's Artemis doing this to me? "So tell her that," she retorted. "She'll understand. She won't like it, but she'll understand." Xena's smile was self-mocking. "Believe me, I know."

When the goddess showed no sign of responding to her, Xena continued speaking. "Look, Artemis... I can't help her this time, and it's driving me to distraction. But you can help her. She's already decided she doesn't want to be a goddess, she's just not sure how to undo it." She waited, but after no response, she grudgingly continued, "You know I don't get along very well with the gods, but if you could possibly..."

"I can't," she sadly denied, "I just can't." She vanished in a flare of white light. "Take it," her disembodied voice ordered, before fading away as well, leaving the neatly field dressed animal by the bank of the stream as a peace offering.

Gathering the animal's prepared remains carefully, she headed back to camp. She hadn't expected Artemis to help, but it had been worth the small effort of asking, even though it had been essentially fruitless. Now they just had to find a way to undo the effects of ambrosia without the help of even the most sympathetic gods. If Gabrielle's idea worked, Artemis' refusal wouldn't matter, and if it didn't... well, maybe a little bit of the guilt she'd tried to induce would be useful later. Carrying the carcass, she headed back towards their campsite.

The woods were quiet once more, the animal tracks vanished as though they had never been there in the first place. Xena knew then that Artemis had withdrawn her blessing from the wood - now that the hunt had been concluded. She strode into the clearing they were camping in with the stag's body draped across her shoulders, straining slightly under its weight, and simply stared at the two unoccupied men who were lounging by the fire.

Iolaus' eyes widened at the sight of the pure white stag over her shoulders, but he jumped up to relieve the warrior of her burden. Forewarned by Iolaus about her less than jovial camp side manners, especially in regards to cooking, Autolycus leaped to help the short blonde hunter carry the animal away for butchering without comment. As they were walking away, she heard the thief mutter, "Tell me again why I have to do this?"

One corner of Xena's mouth quirked up in a lopsided grin as the two lugged the heavy weight of the carcass into the bushes and away from the camp. She hadn't even needed to say a word and they'd leaped to obey. Sometimes it's good being who and what I am.

Her smile faded as she glanced over to see Gabrielle and Hercules. His shirt and jacket were lying draped across a fallen log nearby, and she was standing in front of him. Close in front of him.

Gabrielle was holding one hand up in front of her face clutching a glowing ball of brilliant white energy, while the other hand was resting flat on Hercules' belly, fingers dangerously close to intimate territory. Xena was going to say something to her friend to interrupt, when she noticed Hercules looked almost as uncomfortable with the situation as she herself felt. She forced herself to wait, eyes narrowing while she fought down the irrational surge of jealousy at seeing her friend so... intimately if innocently connected to the demigod; she knew it was unreasonable, but she couldn't help herself. She was feeling very possessive, her jealousy tuned to a fever pitch thanks to the very real danger that she would lose Gabrielle forever to the gods.

Gabrielle's hand slipped even lower. Xena abruptly turned and headed back into the woods. She needed to clean the stag's blood from her leathers before it dried, and she did not want to see what she feared Gabrielle was likely to do next.

Xena sank down onto the bank of the stream and calmly began cleansing the blood from her clothing. I am not going to think about what Gabrielle is doing, she firmly told herself. Not thinking about those fingers against the taut belly, nope. Not going to think about it. Not going to think about what was a mere fraction of a finger's width away from her grasp...

Naturally she couldn't get the image out of her mind. Those delicate fingers, pressing against the demigod's belly, dipping lower... She dunked her head in the cold water, but it failed to banish the images her mind conjured - images made crystal clear by memories of her own hands in the same location. "This is not helping," she cursed irritably. She hurriedly finished her ablutions, then headed back to camp, moving at a speed just short of a sprint.

She was almost embarrassed by the depth of her relief when she found Gabrielle's hand in exactly the same spot it had been when she'd left. Xena wrestled her jealousy into quiescence and sat on a nearby log to watch.

Her friend hadn't even noticed Xena's return. Gabrielle frowned in concentration, her eyes intent as her fingers pressed firmly against the twitching muscles of Hercules' lower abdomen, probing carefully while the glowing ball of energy in her hand pulsed brighter as she searched for just the right spot...

Her fingers slid a finger's breadth lower, until they were nestled in the sparse hairs peeking out of the top of his pants at the base of his abdomen. Xena opened her mouth to say something to interrupt the fingers' progress, when Hercules abruptly screamed in agony.

"Got it!" Gabrielle cried out excitedly. She pulled her hand away from his pants, while the light in her other hand winked out like a candle being snuffed. She steadied the big man as he swayed unsteadily on his feet. "Are you alright?" she asked him worriedly. "I'm so sorry... I didn't mean to do that, but when I..."

"Yeah, I'm fine," he managed to say, stopping her apology midword. Shaking his head to clear it of the lingering haze left from the wrenching pain, he found himself unable to stop leaning heavily on her. She wrapped one arm around his waist as she braced herself to help keep him upright. "That... hurt," he slowly explained. He breathed slowly and deeply while he worked to recover his balance. "I feel much better now," he added, a hint of amusement clear in his voice as he almost fell over.

Iolaus and Autolycus chose that moment to sprint back into camp. Iolaus carried a skinning knife in one bloodied hand, while Autolycus bore a pair of daggers, and looked almost as green as his clothing. They skidded to a stop and frantically looked around, seeking the source of the scream.

"It's alright," Gabrielle hurriedly reassured them, turning briefly away from the recovering Hercules to face them. "I just accidentally pulled on something I shouldn't have."

The two looked from Gabrielle, with one arm wrapped snugly around the waist of the topless Hercules, to the embarrassed demigod who had one arm thrown across her shoulders, then repeated the looks. Gabrielle blushed furiously and was about to deny everything, when Autolycus abruptly began dragging Iolaus back into the bushes. "This is another thing we don't really want to know... come on."

Xena watched them fade back into the forest with a hint of amusement, then approached Gabrielle while Hercules hurried to redress, still a bit unsteady on his feet. "What happened?"

"I was locating the points where his soul is tied to the source of his strength, and also where it connects to the body - you know, it's amazing, but they're tied together in the same places!" Her excitement faded as she read Xena's impatience. "Anyway, I found the last point of connection. It's..." she trailed off and blushed. "right underneath his... you know." She grimaced in embarrassment. "Anyway, I accidentally tugged on his spirit when I was tracing the point of merger, trying to find how it's tied together, so I can be ready when I try to disconnect it in me, and..."

Hercules nodded in agreement at her description, but interrupted when she paused. "It was like my soul was being ripped from my body... it hurt." Seeing Gabrielle's crestfallen expression and the horror in her eyes at what she'd unintentionally inflicted upon him, he hastened to reassure her. "I feel fine now, Gabrielle. It was nothing permanent."

When even that failed to alleviate the pain in her eyes, he tried joking. "See?" he flexed his muscles impressively. "I'm fine. In fact, I feel up to about seven more labors. Got any stables that need cleaning?"

Despite herself, Gabrielle couldn't repress a small smile at his attempt to cheer her up. Hercules saw it, and smiled back. Patting her back gently, he reassured her with his understanding and forgiveness.

"You're such a good man, Hercules," she murmured, pulling him into a quick hug. "I don't know what I'd have done without you."

Hercules smiled, half pleased and half embarrassed. He abruptly became aware of Xena's expression - which was entirely too blank and focused on him for his comfort - as she watched their innocent embrace. Taking the hint, he gently unwrapped her arms from around him. "Why don't I go get the others, huh?"

Xena nodded her thanks, and her apology for her reaction was clear in her eyes. Hercules gravely nodded in turn, understanding her reaction completely. He turned and followed the other two men into the trees, leaving the two women alone.

After a moment, Xena finally spoke. "So you know what to do now?" she asked, her face a mask as she fought to master her turbulent emotions which were swirling almost too rapidly to identify.

"Yes," Gabrielle said simply.

Nodding, Xena remained mute, trying to master the maelstrom of her emotions. After several minutes had passed with nothing further said, the warrior was surprised to find herself needing to fill the silence.

"I went hunting, while you were... probing Hercules."

Smiling, Gabrielle nodded happily, recognizing Xena's attempt to make conversation for what it truly was. "Good. I'm a little hungry. What did you find? Anything?"

More than I bargained for, that's for sure, Xena thought, but didn't say. "Actually, I didn't even have to hunt. Artemis showed up."

The smile on the goddess' lips slowly faded, leaving a much too casually blank expression on her face. "Did she?"

Knowing it was probably the wrong decision, but feeling compelled to explain regardless, she began again. "She brought down a stag, then dressed it for us. I think she's sorry, Gabrielle. She just wanted what's best for you."

The warmth in Gabrielle's eyes froze slightly. "What SHE thought was best for me," she pointed out. "I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions, Xena. I am a grown goddess at the moment, remember?" she added sardonically.

Sighing in frustration. Gabrielle turned away and wrapped her arms tightly around her body, isolating herself from her friend. "You're making the same mistake... again... that Ares and Artemis and all the others have, Xena. You think I'm giving up godhood just because of you."

Xena was going to protest, but her earlier ruminations came back to her. Should she be trying to talk her out of being a goddess? Should she instead be trying to persuade her to accept the change?

"I hate to have to tell you this, Xena, but... You know that I love you, and that I don't want to leave you. However," she paused then turned back to look into the warrior's eyes. "This isn't about you. Not really. It's about me. I am my own person, and I don't want to be a goddess. Period.

"I want to be a mortal, and I want to stay by your side. The two are not the same thing at all. Frankly, even if I'd never met you, I'd still be turning down this godhood. It's a trap, and a cage, and spiritual poison - but that's not important right now.

"Having you for a friend and companion is the best thing that's ever happened to me - but I am still my own person. I hated it when you tried to do what you thought was best for me, without letting me know what you were feeling, or what you thought of all the options and letting me make my own informed decisions." The specter of Perdicas abruptly loomed large in Xena's mind. She had almost lost Gabrielle to the former soldier when she had remained silent about her feelings, and her suspicions of Gabrielle's true feelings.

"Do you understand?" Gabrielle continued. "In a way I am doing this for you, but only indirectly. I'm really doing this for me. So please... please, don't try and argue with me about doing the right thing, or tell me Artemis wants me. Believe me, I know all that, and I've made my decision, and I'm fully prepared to face the consequences of that decision. Just let me know what you feel, and let me make my own judgement."

Xena nodded slowly. Even after having recognized the ironic nature of her conversation with Artemis, she'd still automatically fallen into the same old bad habit of not appreciating Gabrielle's own wisdom and her ability to make her own choices. She'd unconsciously and automatically been urging her to do what she thought was best for her, rather than letting her know what she thought of the options, and... without letting Gabrielle know what she really felt about it.

And Gabrielle had seen straight through her. Again. Before she'd even realized herself what she was doing. Not only that, she'd managed to make her recognize her own failing without triggering her instinctive defensive mechanisms. The "She's too young to know what's best," or the "she's just infatuated," defenses hadn't even twitched during Gabrielle's speech. She really is grown up, Xena realized.

For the first time, Xena voluntarily let Gabrielle take her fate into her own hands. Completely of her own volition, and without trying to take advantage of her friendship to try to influence her towards what she thought was best for her, she let her go - and by so doing, kept her even closer.

For some reason, she thought of Lao Ma. She must be laughing at me, in whatever underworld served the peoples of Ch'in, for taking so long to learn this lesson. No, she realized, she'd just smile that small smile of hers, and make another mostly inscrutable comment about how she was closer to learning the way...

"I'm sorry Gabrielle," she began slowly, bolstered by her remembrance. "I'll respect whatever choices you decide to make. Since I know I'd," she emphasized, "prefer you remaining a mortal, and you've said you'd prefer this as well, you should prepare for what you need to do to remove this godhood. I can't guide you on this, it's something I've never had to face, but... I love you, and will respect whatever decisions you make. Do what you have to, and I'll help in any way I can."

Gabrielle nodded happily; she knew full well how hard it was for Xena to admit those things, and to let her make her own decisions, and that she'd chosen to do that for her made her feel warm and wonderful inside. Now if only she could become a mortal again, her life would be close to perfect. "Thank you, Xena," she whispered, pulling her into a tight embrace.

Naturally, that was the precise moment the three men walked back into camp. "What is it with being a goddess, anyway?" Autolycus demanded upon seeing them, before turning around and marching back out of camp. "And when is it my turn?"

"So Gabrielle," Iolaus began once they'd broken their clench, and everyone had settled down around the campfire. "Herc says you know how to," he waved one hand as he searched for the right words, "to get rid of your godhood?"

"Yes. There are these seven points of connection between the soul and the... the source of divine power I guess you can call it. Interestingly enough, it's tied to the same points on the body. The points are here," she pointed to her forehead, then blushing very slightly, pointed to her crotch, "...here, and..."

"Like the chakra?" the hunter asked, looking abruptly interested.

"What?" Xena and Gabrielle chorused.

"The Chakra. The seven centers of mystic energy in the body." He pointed to their locations on himself, then added, "I learned all about them when I was in the east learning how to fight."

Gabrielle was amazed. The seven points were identical. "That's amazing! Whoever you learned from somehow managed to chart the locations of the soul's connection to the body!"

"Oh yeah," Iolaus agreed blandly. "They were some of the wisest people I've ever met." He smiled proudly, then added, "That's where I learned the truth about what the world's like."

Gabrielle looked at Hercules. Had he told his friend... she didn't like to think about the truth, but since becoming a goddess she now knew for a fact what the sun really was and how the earth was related to it. Even now, thinking about it made her feel a little queasy as she contemplated the speed at which they were moving, as the world revolved on its axis, and circled the sun, and moved outward and... Another dubious "benefit" of being a goddess.

"They're the ones who told me about the elephants," Iolaus finished proudly.

The goddess did a double take. "Elephants?" she asked faintly, looking once more to Hercules. He shrugged his shoulders. He knew the truth also, but had never been able to convince Iolaus of that fact.

"Sure... the elephants who carry the world on their backs."

"Right," Gabrielle said. She wouldn't argue with him on that one. Compared to spinning through nothingness at an unbelievable rate of speed while maintaining position with only the gossamer filaments of attraction, being held up by enormous elephants was actually more appealing in an odd sort of way - even if it didn't address what the elephants stood on while holding up the world.

Hercules had to smile. His own reaction to Iolaus' beliefs had been much the same.

"Anyway," the goddess resumed, "these seven points, the chakra... whatever you want to call them, they tie the soul to the body, but also tie the soul of a divine being to the source of the gods' power... whatever that is."

"Don't look at me," Hercules quickly added as the others turned to look at him. "I don't know either."

Xena frowned, not liking the mystery, but having to accept it. It was entirely possible the gods themselves didn't even know what it was. She set that aside to think about later.

"So anyway, these chakra that connect the soul... they are in the same locations in both Hercules and me, and in Xena... so it doesn't matter if you're a human, demigod, or god. Which means I don't have to worry about them shifting when I sever the connection." Her tone became slightly pedantic as she continued with her explanation. "If you consider the locations of the chakra, they form what can be considered a finite bounded plane between the soul and..." She looked thoughtful. "You know, this raises some interesting possibilities. If the gods have..."

Autolycus cleared his throat before she could get too far off the topic. "That's all well and good, but can you fix... you know, whatever it is you need to fix?"

Nodding, Gabrielle thought about what she'd need to do. Her plan should work, but... She opened her mouth to explain, but Iolaus interrupted before she could even start.

Holding up one hand to forestall further confusing details that he wouldn't understand anyway, Iolaus asked simply, "So you can do it?"

Slowly, Gabrielle nodded again. "Yes..." she answered.

"You don't sound very confident," Xena noted with concern.

"Well, it's just," she paused, then continued. "I have a little bit of oracular ability, you know?"

Xena nodded. After a moment, her face darkened as she caught the implication. "You know you'll fail?" she asked softly.

"No, no!" she hurriedly reassured her. "It's just... Ever since I ate that ambrosia, my ability to see the future has been getting stronger." She muttered, "At least now I don't have to be near death to do it," before continuing at a normal volume. "Nothing very precise, but I've had flashes... and when I think about... undoing this, I see absolutely nothing at all." She sighed in frustration. "The problem is, I can't tell if that means I fail or I succeed."

Xena let that sink in. They stared silently at each other for several minutes, unsure of what to say. Eventually, she continued, "What are you going to do? It has to be your choice, but you know I'll support you, no matter what you decide."

Warmed by her comment, Gabrielle slowly answered. "It's not much of a choice," Gabrielle replied. "If I become a full-blown goddess... I won't be me anymore. The office... the job I'm given will literally reshape my soul... I don't want that." She fell silent, and stared at the sky while Xena and the others watched breathlessly. "I think," she began, then resumed in a firmer voice. "I need to go see Ephiny, and then, I need to see my parents. Just in case..." she trailed off.

Nodding slowly, Xena was forced to agree with her reasoning. If it failed, or if something went horribly wrong, it would be best for her to have... made her goodbyes in advance. She shivered as the enormity of what they were facing sank in. They were approaching a climax.