"What do you mean you don't have any record of her?" Catherine asked in the general direction of the hands-free microphone that was clipped to the visor above the steering wheel while she attempted to maneuver through early rush-hour traffic. "She should have been admitted last night--sometime after midnight. Are you spelling the last name right? That's Frye—with an e on the end."

She listened for a few seconds, eyes searching the street for a parking place on the block with the address she had been given. Pulling to the curb, she said with uncharacteristic irritation, "Never mind. I don't have time to wait. I'll call back later."

She clicked off the cell phone, cut the ignition, and sat for a few seconds behind the wheel, waiting for the last remnants of frustration to ebb. I should have stayed at the hospital last night. It was ridiculous to think I could do this now, not knowing how she is. If I were a patient, I'd say this is a very good example of self-delusion resulting from lousy conflict management and unresolved anger.

"Well, thank you. That's helpful," she said out loud in disgust. Glancing at her watch, she saw that she had five minutes to find the building. "And now you can just do what you came here to do."

She locked the car and started north on Front Street, checking the building numbers as she walked. Fortunately, she had guessed right and had started searching in the appropriate direction. In less than a minute she was standing on the steps of a four story warehouse fumbling in her briefcase for her wallet and a photo ID. After the disembodied voice instructed her to enter and an electronic lock clicked open, she stepped through into the cavernous ground floor and proceeded toward the elevator as she had been directed. As curious as she was about the place, her mind was only half on her surroundings. She had spent another restless night, finding it difficult to fall asleep after the adrenaline surge of emotions that had started when she had first gotten the call from Sandy and which hadn't begun to abate until she had seen that Rebecca was stable. It had been excruciatingly hard to leave her, but the evening had brought up so many conflicting feelings that she doubted either of them were equipped to deal with the aftermath in the middle of the night. Nevertheless, when she had finally slid naked beneath the sheets, she had ached for her, body and soul.

The elevator stopped smoothly and opened with no more than a whisper, whereupon she found herself looking out into an enormous room filled with electronic equipment. It was time to set her personal life aside, and do her job. Stepping out into the hall that ran along one side of the building opposite the warren of computer stations, she glanced right and left looking for someone who might know where the meeting was. Almost immediately, she saw a woman in jeans and an open-collared navy shirt approaching. At first glance, the startlingly attractive woman didn't strike Catherine as being a law-enforcement officer of any type. Even discounting her decidedly informal appearance, she moved with a kind of casual confidence that suggested she rarely worried about protocol. There was none of the tight focus that Rebecca displayed when she was working or the self-important attitude of the typical bureaucrat. If she were asked to guess, Catherine would say this was the private consultant.

"Good morning," Catherine said as the woman drew near. "I'm Doctor Catherine Rawlings."

"J. T. Sloan, Doctor." Sloan extended her hand to the elegant, auburn-haired woman and added, "We were just gathering in the conference room. I'll take you down."

"Thank you."

As they walked, Sloan explained, "Unfortunately, the full team isn't here at the moment, but I know your schedule is very tight so we'll go with what we have and I'll fill in the others later."

Much later, Catherine thought to herself, but she merely nodded. She wondered, not for the first time that morning, if Rebecca would be pulled from the case. At this point it should be evident to everyone at police headquarters that she wasn't ready to go back to work. In some ways, it was fortunate that the episode had occurred when it did. If it had happened when Rebecca was in the middle of an altercation, or even if she had just been out on the street alone, the outcome could have been disastrous. At any rate, she was out of danger for the moment and Catherine gratefully cleared her mind to focus on the job at hand. As she followed Sloan into a glass enclosed conference room, several people stood and turned in her direction. One of them she already knew.

"Doctor Rawlings,” Sloan began, “this is my associate Jason McBride, Agent Clark--there at the end of the table, and Officer Mitchell, who is with the Philadelphia Police Department."

Catherine shook each individual's hand in turn, saying merely, "Officer Mitchell," in a neutral tone when she got to her. It wasn't uncommon for her to run into patients in social or professional settings, and although she tried to anticipate when that might happen and discuss with the patient their feelings about it, it wasn't always possible to do that. She had known Mitchell was involved in a task force that might have been this one, but she hadn't really expected her to be at the briefing. As was usual when something like this happened, it was something they would have to deal with later.

"Thank you for coming on such short notice, Doctor," Clark said with an appreciative smile. Looking pointedly at Sloan, he added, "Our investigation is moving a little faster than we had anticipated. Since I know that time is short, and I expect that what Sloan and McBride have to discuss will be of most use to you, let me say a few brief words and then turn it over to them."

Catherine listened while he gave her a capsule summary of the task force's purpose and some background on the results of similar operations across the nation, but she was watching the people at the table, trying to get a sense of how the individuals fit into the team. Clark, the federal representative, alone at one end of the table and the first to speak, was the titular head, but she had the feeling that Sloan, an arm draped over the back of her chair in an utterly relaxed pose, was the real leader. The woman projected an incredible sense of self-assurance and as she toyed with a pencil, her eyes fixed on a spot in the center of the table, she reminded Catherine of a great, sleek predator fixing on its prey. Her associate, the remarkably handsome man by her side, was completely expressionless, but his eyes glinted with intelligence. Mitchell sat stiffly to her right, and Catherine wasn't certain if that was due to her presence or just the young officer's natural intensity.  Were Rebecca present, Catherine knew, she'd be sitting across from Sloan, the two of them perfectly matched in skill and drive. Rebecca, relentlessly single-minded when in pursuit of a suspect, was every bit the hunter Sloan appeared to be. The thought of Rebecca brought a swift surge of longing, and Catherine brought her complete attention back to Clark.

He was saying, "We have some information pertaining to perpetrator profiles that have been generated by other investigations. What we need, Doctor—actually, what Sloan and McBride need—is a way to flag the contacts with the most potential to lead us into a real life meeting. Any guidance you can provide would be welcome."

"Before we get into specifics," Catherine said, turning her attention to Sloan and her colleague, "I had planned to review a few broad characteristics of the subjects. That may be redundant, however, if you are all familiar with them."

"It wouldn't be for me, ma'am," Mitchell said from beside Catherine, meeting her gaze unwaveringly when Catherine glanced at her.

"I agree, Doctor," Sloan added, wanting to hear what the psychiatrist had to say. She'd had enough experience with Bureau profilers to know that they were often too rigid with their composites to be of any real use in dealing with individuals. In all fairness, that probably resulted from the necessity of using probability models, but maybe a clinician who had real life experience would have a different take. From the brief rundown Clark had given her, this woman was supposed to be an excellent forensic consultant, even though it wasn't her primary specialty.

"Let me tell you where we stand. Thus far Jason has focused on establishing an Internet presence by adapting various persona that might be attractive to someone who is interested in preteens or adolescents. I've has been trying to localize areas of concentrated activity by targeting intersecting or overlapping patterns of transmission, site traffic, and financial expenditures. The theory being that eventually these two lists can be cross-referenced using additional identifiers to produce a manageable number of individuals for actual investigation. Jason and I are close to narrowing down the search, and while we started with a broad net, we've found ourselves with more potential avenues of pursuit than we could possibly explore. Very shortly, we're going to be in one-on-one situations and there's a real likelihood of scaring these guys away if we go about it incorrectly."

Smiling, Catherine replied, "All right then. I'll hit the highlights and then you tell me what else you need from me."

"Excellent," Sloan replied, liking the psychiatrist's composed, noncompetitive attitude. There was no evidence of the turf struggles she'd been used to within the agency when different departments collaborated. And there was a sincerity in the woman's calm, ocean green eyes that instilled trust. Sloan caught herself short and almost grinned at her uncharacteristic reaction. She bet Catherine Rawlings was one hell of a psychiatrist. "Fire away, Doctor."

"What we're talking about here is typology," Catherine began, "profiling if you will. Despite popular conceptions, I'm sure all of you realize that this is not hard science. We can make general assumptions, but there are always exceptions, and it pays to be flexible when assessing prospective perpetrators."

Mitchell, Catherine noticed, was taking notes. "Pedophiles are almost always men, and may be heterosexual or homosexual. It's difficult to determine the percentages, because so many instances are never reported. I assume this will have some bearing on how you focus your Internet search, and since I don't know your starting point, my best advice would be to know the victims and begin there."

"As far as we can ascertain," Sloan said carefully, "the video productions we're interested in tracking are primarily adult men depicted with adolescent girls. We have Jason trying to make contact both as a young girl and as an adult male."

"Sounds reasonable," Catherine responded. "The Internet provides a sense of anonymity, thus making many individuals more comfortable in revealing socially unacceptable preferences that they might otherwise keep hidden for fear of exposure and reprisal. On the other hand, that may make it easier for you to pick up on the truly serious pedophiles because they will have a false sense of security—believing that the Internet provides a blind behind which they can hide."

"I'm sorry?" Mitchell asked abruptly. "Serious pedophiles as opposed to what?"

"Sorry. Poor choice of words. What we know is that a large percentage of individuals are content with graphic material and have no interest in instituting true sexual contact. They will most likely never act on their fantasies."

"Collectors," Jason clarified. "The bulletin boards and newsgroups are filled with people who just want to trade image files. They look but don’t tough. Then there are the chatters, the ones who probably never take their interest behind the keyboard."

"Precisely," Catherine agreed. "These men rarely show any interest in exchanging files, but do spend hours online engaging in cybersex and occasionally escalating to phone sex. Both groups are on the bottom rung of the probability ladder in terms of likelihood of sexual contact. Because the problem is so widespread, both geographically and in terms of numbers, it makes sense to focus on the theoretically more dangerous class of perpetrators. These would be the travelers—men who manipulate online relationships with children in an attempt to institute real-life contact. They often set up meetings, paying for bus fare or plane tickets or hotel rooms in advance, and then coaxing kids into joining them."

“How do we sort them out—or get them to expose themselves,” Sloan asked, ignoring Jason’s pointed groan at her unintended pun.

"If you were to ask me how to target an individual type--men you could actually track down and ultimately arrest,” Catherine said by way of summary, “I’d say you need to bond with them, instill trust. And the fastest way to do that is to express the behaviors that you expect them to display. Instead of trying to make direct contact, which might seem suspicious, let them see you doing what they do—talk about the same kind of lust object, vocalize a desire for obtaining images, or boast about a fabricated conquest. They’ll come to you eventually, because they are seeking validation through others like themselves.”

"Perfect," Sloan said, giving Catherine an appreciative glance. Yeah, she's good all right. "Jason? Any thoughts?"

He looked pensive. "I can focus more on my interactions in the chat rooms and try to attract some attention."

"Mitchell?" Sloan added. "We can use one of the computer models to screen the chat transcripts for identifiers."

Mitchell's face lit up. "Absolutely."

Catherine turned to Avery Clark. "It seems to me that your team already has the plan well in hand. I'm not certain how I can help you."

"I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on that, too," a voice said from the doorway.

Everyone in the room turned as Rebecca and Watts walked in.

chapter twentyone

"Sorry we’re late," Rebecca said, carefully avoiding Catherine's eyes. "Traffic." She and Watts took seats at the table while everyone murmured greetings.

Clark said, "Dr. Rawlings, this is Detective Sergeant..."

"We've met, thank you." Catherine stared at Rebecca, her initial disbelief having given way to something between incredulity and outrage. The detective was wearing the same clothes that Catherine had last seen her in, and it was obvious that she had come directly from the hospital. From the nearly translucent pallor of her skin and the hollow shadows beneath her eyes, it looked like that's precisely where she still should be—in a hospital bed.

Sloan watched the two of them curiously, aware that the temperature in the room had plummeted to below freezing, but she wasn't quite certain the cause. Frye had taken a seat across from her to the left of Rawlings, and after a brief nod to the psychiatrist, the detective stared pointedly ahead. Still, Sloan could have sworn the air between them vibrated, rather like the tremor in the tracks when a freight train approached. Something very volatile going on there—professional differences, maybe? Cops rarely take to theoreticians.

Then, Sloan smiled inwardly, thinking of her own theoretician and how very quickly and inextricably she had taken to her. Thinking about Michael in the middle of a meeting was a bad idea, because Michael, in body or spirit, was the only thing she had ever encountered that could distract her. And she couldn't afford to be distracted--not with Clark already hinting that he'd picked up on how quickly she and Jason had developed a working list of suspects. She wanted to end the briefing as quickly as possible, before Clark could push her for the specifics of their investigation or ask just how they had managed to assemble a preliminary list of potentials in record time. Clearing her throat, she said into the obvious silence, "We have transcripts of dozens of online chats between Jason and personalities who thought he was a 13-year-old girl. We also have a number of hits from men in a private bulletin board who have made overt or veiled allusions to movie distribution. It would be great to nail them—all of them—but what we really want are the manufacturers. Those are the guys who have set up their computers as FTP servers and are broadcasting to a select group of subscribers. With a videocam hook up, they can produce live feeds of child sex. And they have the kids."

"Locations?" Rebecca asked sharply. She needed a lead to chase, a case to work--something to take her mind off the hollow feeling in her chest that hurt every time she breathed. The pain had built all night in that empty place where Catherine had once dwelled, until finally she hadn't been able to stand it any longer and she'd called Watts. Catherine sat next to her now, and she felt like they were strangers. The loneliness had been so much easier to bear before. Before she had known what it was to be touched. "Anything solid?" she asked, hoping she didn't sound as desperate as she felt.  

"Nothing specific, not yet," Sloan admitted. "But we're pretty sure they’re regional, if not local." She glanced at Catherine. "It would be very helpful if you could go through these with us, and give us your take on the most likely possibles, and perhaps lend some insight as to how Jason can more effectively manipulate them into committing themselves."

"And then?" Catherine asked with genuine interest, even as she listened with relief to the sound of Rebecca breathing beside her. Respirations steady, unlabored. Stable. For now.

Sloan grinned, a happy, hungry grin. "As soon as we narrow it down to a manageable number, I can launch digger programs which will follow the sender back to his ISP address, among other things. Then we'll cross-reference to the credit card clearing houses, track the business sources. Get us some names."

"Yeah, and once you get us a name, we can start knocking on doors," Watts said with evident satisfaction. "Real police work."

Sloan managed not to snarl.

"Anything from your street sources, Detective?" Clark asked, looking at Rebecca.

"Not yet." She had no intention of sharing anything with Clark at this point, and she certainly didn't want to discuss the details of the case with Catherine in the room. Jesus, everyone was acting like Catherine was an official part of the team.

"My schedule is pretty full," Catherine stated, "but I should be able to spare an hour or two in the evenings--or even during the day if you absolutely need me."

Avery Clark stood, signaling the end of the meeting. "We'll try to give you as much advance notice as we can, Doctor. Any time you can spare would be greatly appreciated. I'll leave the details to you and Sloan to work out."

"Certainly," Catherine replied, standing as well and gathering her things.

"Sloan, may I see you outside?" Clark murmured softly as he passed behind her.

"Sure." Sloan responded, rising and following.

Jason and Mitchell left as well, leaving Catherine staring at Rebecca while Watts fidgeted in the doorway, looking as if he wasn't certain whether to go or stay.

"What in God's name are you doing here?" Catherine demanded.

"I knew the meeting wouldn't be long. I wanted to make it."

"How did you get discharged so quickly?"

Rebecca held Catherine's gaze. "I was never admitted."

“Jim would never have released you, not in the shape you were in last night. You signed out AMA, didn’t you?” she accused furiously. She wanted to touch her. It felt like days since she had. But she was so angry, the last thing she wanted was contact. Her mind was reeling from the barrage of dissident emotions.

“Not exactly against medical advice. We made a deal.” She said it reasonably, trying to sound confident, but Catherine's fury was so potent it was like a blow. Her hands trembled and she stuffed them in her pockets.

“Doctors don’t make deals,” the psychiatrist snapped.

“All right,” Rebecca admitted. “But I agreed to go back for a chest xRay this morning.”

“And if your lung drops right now?”

“He left a catheter in my chest. In an emergency, he said I’d be able to aspirate the air out. That I'd have plenty of time to get back to the emergency room.”

Catherine slammed both palms down on the tabletop and leaned forward, her eyes blazing. "What is the matter with you? Don't you know you almost died last night? What could be so important about this meeting?"

"It's not the meeting," Rebecca said quietly, but the fear was thundering through her now. She had to stay calm. If she explained it clearly, Catherine would have to understand. "If I let them admit me, if I didn't show up here--if I can’t work--they won't just take me off the case. They'll put me on medical disability. I won't even have light-duty."

"You shouldn't have any kind of duty! You should be home or in the hospital." Catherine whirled in Watts’ direction so quickly that he jumped. "Did you have a hand in this? After all the nights we sat by her bedside, waiting for her to live or die? After that, you could help her do this?" She ran a hand over her eyes and then slowly turned from one to the other. In a voice that was deadly calm, she said, "I do not understand what is important to you. All I know is that whatever it is, it's more important to you than your life. And I can't live with knowing that."

For a moment, it seemed as if no one even breathed. Then, Catherine quietly lifted her briefcase and walked from the room.

*****

Rebecca stood rigidly, the fingertips of her right hand pressed against the granite table top, white to the bone. She hadn't realized that her eyes were closed until they snapped open at the sound of Watts' voice. She blinked in the bright sunlight coming through the windows.

"Sarge?"

"I want to talk to Mitchell and you—alone. We need to assess where we are in this case. Five minutes, in our conference room."

"She's just steamed, Sarge. She'll get over it."

No, she won't. Christ, what do I do now?

"You just gotta give her ti—"

"Let it go, Watts."

"Yeah, but—"

"Goddamn it," she shouted, her fist connecting with stone as she pounded her hand onto the table. "Go find Mitchell and shut the—"

She started to cough and he thought his heart would stop. "Oh, fuck. Are you—"

"I'm fine," she snapped, waving a hand as she caught her breath. "Just do it."

"Right. Just do me a fucking favor and go sit down until we get there." He didn't wait for an answer, but went to find the rookie. They couldn't get back to the hospital soon enough to suit him.

*****

Sloan looked up as Watts charged by and then caught sight of Frye still in the conference room. She walked back in, poured a cup of coffee, and leaned against the counter, observing the detective, who seemed a little unsteady on her feet.

"You all right?"

Rebecca stared at her. "Yeah."

Sloan sipped her coffee. "We're making progress."

"Good," the detective sighed, giving in and sitting down. She rubbed her eyes, then blew out a breath. Just work the case, Frye. That's what you do. That's what you know. "Because I'm not. We had a couple of names from the previous kiddie prostitution bust, but we haven't been able to turn up anything. I've got a few feelers out, but so far, nada. There's a rumor of somebody making movies, but so far that's weak. If I get lucky, someone will point us toward that."

"It's early, on a case like this," Sloan observed mildly, wondering how out of line it would be to ask Frye what the hell was going on. The cop didn't exactly make it easy to get friendly, but she looked like she was hurting. And not just physically.

"Is Clark on to your FBI hack?" Rebecca asked suddenly.

"You're sharp, Frye," Sloan said with an appreciative laugh. "You were here, what? Five minutes? And you picked up on a certain tension between us?"

"I've met the type." Rebecca shrugged and grinned weakly. "When someone says outside the way Clark said it, it usually implies they have a burr up their ass."

"He suspects we might have used unorthodox methods to acquire some of our information, but he didn't want specifics."

"They never do," Rebecca observed wearily. "Too accountable then."

"Yeah. Mostly he wanted to be certain that I understood that I was on my own."

"Why are you doing this, Sloan? You could be making a lot more money doing something with a lot less potential to fuck you over."

Sloan walked to the sink and poured out the last of her coffee, surprised at the question. When she turned around, she said quietly, all hint of her usual cockiness gone. "Maybe I wanted them to see what they lost."

Rebecca rose, more surprised at herself for asking than she was by Sloan's answer. "That's a fairly fucked up reason."

"Yeah," Sloan admitted, feeling an odd sense of relief.

"But I understand," Rebecca added as she headed out the door. "Keep me up to speed, Sloan."

"Right," Sloan called after her. She hesitated for a second, then walked to the wall phone and dialed a number. After a second, she smiled and said, "Hey. Any chance you could meet me for lunch?...No special reason. I just love you."

CHAPTER TWENTYTWO

Hazel Holcomb reached for the phone, pushing aside a pile of administrative bulletins as she did. "Yes?"

"Catherine Rawlings is on line two," her secretary informed her.

"I'll take it." She pressed the other line and said, "Catherine? What can I do for you?"

"Can you see me this morning?"

"Just a minute," Hazel replied, instantly alert to the flat tone of her friend's voice. She rummaged under a stack of file folders and found her weekly schedule. "I have forty-five minutes open now. If it's urgent, I could cancel a meeting later this morning."

"No—I'll come right over. I have clinic in an hour, too. That's perfect. Thank you."

Hazel buzzed her secretary and instructed, "Send Doctor Rawlings in when she arrives, and then hold my calls."

Five minutes later, a knock on the door heralded Catherine's arrival.

"I'm sorry to barge in like this," Catherine began as she took one of the upholstered chairs in front of Hazel's desk.

"It's fine," the Chief of Psychiatry assured her colleague as she moved around to join her in the other chair. "What's happened?"

"Is it that obvious?" Catherine asked ruefully, folding her hands in her lap to hide the trembling. "God, I'm embarrassed."

"Catherine, nothing is obvious unless one knows you. You wouldn't have called if it weren't important, and you wouldn't have that very wounded expression in your eyes if it weren't personal. So—something has happened."

"I think Rebecca and I just—I don't even know what to call it. Broke up?"

"Well," Hazel said gently, a small smile on her face. "We can start with that. What prompted this—event?"

"I'm not sure," Catherine admitted. "That's why I'm here."

"Ah, I see. Good point—spoken like a true psychiatrist. Let's hear the details, then we'll plumb for all the deeper, hidden meanings."

Catherine managed a faint laugh. "Do you talk to all your patients like this? It's very irreverent. Freud is cringing somewhere in another dimension."

"You're not a patient. You're a friend," Hazel replied softly, placing her hand briefly on Catherine's arm. "So, tell me."

Catherine closed her eyes for a few seconds, then opened them and said, "I got a call from a woman last night whom I'd never met, telling me that Rebecca had collapsed in her apartment and that she needed my help." 

Hazel listened, her expression intent, as Catherine described the previous night and morning's events. When her friend fell silent, she remarked, "I'm afraid I have to ask—how do you feel right now?"

"Terribly angry at her, and just—empty." Catherine met Hazel's eyes, tears swimming behind her lashes. "It's tearing me apart that she would risk her life like this, and that she doesn't realize what that does to me."

"Yes, I can see how much it hurts. I'm sorry."

"I thought about calling her Captain, telling him what happened."

"Why didn't you?"

"Because," Catherine replied with a sigh, "it would be divulging patient confidences—"

"You're not her doctor," Hazel pointed out.

"No, but I have privileged knowledge that I wouldn't otherwise have had."

Hazel made a dismissive gesture. "A technicality at best."

"All right," Catherine conceded. "Because she'd never forgive me."

"She's hurt you." Hazel's tone suggested that turn-about was fair play.

"She's hurt me because she's stubborn and careless with herself, but this would be such a betrayal."

"And what she's done--isn't that a betrayal? Of the connection between you? Of your love for one another?"

Catherine regarded her sharply. "It's only a betrayal if you know what you’re doing--if it's a conscious act. She didn't intend to hurt me, she's just doing what's she's always done."

"But things are not the same any longer—for either of you," Hazel pointed out reasonably.

"No," Catherine said quietly. "Everything is different." She looked at Hazel in frustration. "What a mess. I keep thinking that I should be better at this."

Hazel laughed. "Why? Love is messy. Relationships are horrible, unpredictable things." Suddenly serious, she asked, "What do you intend to do?"

"I don't know. I can't be with her like this; I can't watch her kill herself."

"You know, Catherine, I don't know this detective of yours, although I'd certainly like to. She sounds fascinating, especially if you don't happen to be in love with her. But I know that she almost died two months ago. That's a terrifying occurrence. For someone like her, the best defense against that fear is to—"

"Deny it ever happened." Catherine sighed. "Yes, I know. Like the business executive who has an MI, and insists on taking phone calls in the cardiac care unit. I know. It doesn't help." She rubbed her eyes, glanced at her watch. "I have to work, and so do you."

"Don't make any decisions today, or even tomorrow. It's already too late to break up. You love her, remember."

"Yes, I do," Catherine said, wondering if that would be enough.

*****

Catherine contemplated canceling her last patient of the day. It was almost eight; she was tired. Beyond tired. Bone weary and just plain—sad.

"It's going to be a tough session and you want to avoid it. Because she's going to walk in here, all spit and polish, and very possibly pissed off. And she reminds you of Rebecca." She rubbed her temples. "And you've started talking to yourself, which can't be good."

Joyce knocked on the door and stuck her head in. "You've got five minutes. Want anything?"

"Yes," Catherine replied, "when she gets here, tell her I need to resche--"

"What?"

"Nothing. A coke if you're getting one."

"Will do."

A few minutes later, the door opened again to admit Dellon Mitchell.

"Hi," Catherine said as Mitchell settled into the chair. She wasn't in uniform, but she wore her chinos and shirt as if it were one. Neat, tidy, precise.

"Hi."

Catherine waited a beat, and when nothing else appeared to be forthcoming, she said, "Let's talk about this morning."

"All right," Mitchell replied neutrally, but her eyes were wary.

"Sometimes it can be awkward or uncomfortable when you run into your therapist unexpectedly. Was it a problem—my being there?"

Mitchell regarded her steadily. "What we talk about in here—it's confidential, right?"

"Usually, yes," Catherine answered. Mitchell stiffened, and she added quickly, "Officer, you were referred for an official evaluation. I still have to do that. I don't include information that isn't relevant to my opinions, and I very rarely include specific details of what we've discussed."

"But you wouldn't..." She searched for words. "You're going to be working with the people I work with. There are things...private things...I don't want anyone to know."

"They won't learn them from me," Catherine said quietly. "First of all, it's my business to keep confidences. Secondly, I'll be there for professional purposes, and on a fairly limited basis. There is absolutely no reason anyone should know that you and I have a professional relationship."

"Fine."

"Good." The officer crossed one ankle over her knee, and sat back a little into her chair, a pose Catherine was coming to recognize as relaxed. For Mitchell. "Now, let's talk about the incident in the alley."

"I knew her."

Catherine had many years of therapeutic experience, and she was glad of that now. Because she wanted to blurt out, What? Slowly, carefully, she asked, "The young woman who was being attacked?"

"Yes."

"When did you realize that you knew her?"

"When he let her go. She fell...I saw her face in the light from the window."

There was sweat on her forehead that Catherine was certain that she didn't know was there. Her right hand trembled where it rested on the chair arm.

"What happened when you recognized her?"

She was quiet a long time. Then, her voice hoarse, she replied, "I hesitated. I thought maybe I had imagined it. That's when he hit me, knocked me down." She looked at Catherine, stricken. "There was so much blood on her face, I was frozen...I thought she...Jesus, there was so much blood."

Catherine's stomach lurched. So much blood. She took a long, slow breath. "How well do you know her?"

"She's just someone I met...on the job."

"More than a passing acquaintance?" Catherine probed softly. "A friend?"

Another pause. "Yes."

"You told me you don't remember hitting him with your gun."

"I don't." For the first time, the young woman looked scared.

"What do you remember?"

Mitchell ran a hand through her hair. "I remember...I remember her face. I was so fucking angry. The bastard had his hands up her...and then I was on the ground...and she was screaming at him. Screaming not to hurt me..." She stopped and stared at Catherine. "Oh, fuck. I was on the ground, and he kicked me. My head...my side...it hurt. And I could hear her screaming at him...he hit her again, I think. I was afraid he'd kill her."

"Do you remember striking him with your gun?"

"I don't," Mitchell shouted. She covered her face with both hands, shoulders heaving. "I don't."

"It's okay," Catherine said gently. "It's okay."

She finally looked up, her face streaked with tears. "It isn't really, is it?"

"Oh, yes, it is," Catherine replied firmly, sitting forward, hands clasped on the desk. "You were alone, in a dangerous situation. There was the threat of deadly injury to yourself or a civilian. Suddenly, unexpectedly, the situation is personalized—this is someone you know, care about. And you were both in peril. You had a gun, Officer Mitchell...and you were facing a bigger, stronger opponent who had already hurt you. You protected yourself, instinctively, but you didn't shoot him." Catherine paused, making certain that Mitchell was listening. "You didn't shoot him. And you could have. You did well, Officer."

Mitchell grinned weakly, brushing impatiently at the moisture on her cheeks. "Would you mind putting that in your report?"

"I most definitely will," Catherine replied, smiling. "In my opinion you acted appropriately under the given circumstances."

"There's a problem."

"What?"

"The part about me knowing her? It's not in my report."

"Why not?"

"Because that's nobody's business. It doesn't have any bearing on the events. I reported it exactly as it occurred."

Catherine considered the information. "I can't see that it affects the legalities involved, but," she continued as she saw Mitchell give a sigh of relief, "it is germane to the effect this has had on you."

"I'm okay."

"Yes, in all probability you are," Catherine answered wearily, suddenly aware of her own fatigue. "I'll take care of the report to your precinct, Officer."

Mitchell was quiet for a long moment. "Would you mind—uh, holding off for a little while. You said it might take five or six visits, right?"

"Do you mind telling me what brought about this sudden change of heart?"

"I don't want to get pulled off the task force."

 The task force. And here I thought it was my stellar therapy techniques. "I think the situation reasonably warrants another visit or two. But then I'll have to file the report."

"Fair enough. Thank you." Mitchell stood, a smile to match the one she'd had when Sloan included her in the plans that morning. "Thanks a lot."

As the door shut behind the young officer, Catherine leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes.

*****

Rebecca rolled over and opened her eyes. She lifted her wrist and squinted at the dim dial of her watch. Nine p.m. She'd been asleep for eleven hours. She was wearing loose cotton workout shorts and nothing else. Her body was covered with a thin film of sweat, and when she brushed her palm over her chest and down her abdomen, her hand came away wet.

Nine p.m. Plenty of time to get some work done. She got up from the bed, stiff muscles protesting, and made her way into the bathroom to shower.